


Live Porn

by SophieDAnne



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Bottom Harry Styles, First Love, First Time, Gay, M/M, Rimming, Top Louis Tomlinson, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2020-10-11 10:10:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 27,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20544428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SophieDAnne/pseuds/SophieDAnne
Summary: 16-year-old Harry Styles hears his classmates laughing at porn movies in the locker room. This catches his attention, who is overflowing with insatiable desire and frustration, thanks to the raging teenage hormones. He'd never dated boys before, and his first encounter with gay porn changes everything.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys,  
Here is my first book in English. First of all, I would like to apologize if you find some mistakes in it. My native language is Hungarian, but I live in USA so speak English as well, and I hope you'll enjoy the story. Thank you very much to my sister for helping me with the translation. I love you to the moon and back! I won't talk anymore, I really hope you guys will like this story.  
Love, Sophie

**※Harry※**

Carol pushes my thigh under the table to pay attention to it while trying to ignore her as hard as I can. Not that she ever let me do this in my life. They cannot be ignore her. But soon the semester exam is here and I really don't want to have the worst grade in my class. I plan to finish this semester even better than the previous one, but if I losing my paper because of Carol, it doesn't help too much in the pre-graduation run. Physics is not my strength, but I'm a shaky B-some. If this is an 'A', God is my witness, I learned it so hard, it must be, then they certainly won't be a triple 'C', and so I've already improved on my last year.

"Don't be an asshole!" she whispers beside me, and I see Mrs. Anderson slowly looking up from her book. Obviously, she had heard me quickly catch my eye and silently beg her not to come here. I can hear her chair scratching the old, scrappy wooden floor, and her slow footsteps between the tables as she knocks on her shoe. After she passes by, she starts back, so we have our back. And thanks to this, Carol leans over to me again and whispers in my ear, while her red curls fall on my shoulder. "Help me!"

I'd love to whisper to her to leave me alone, because I don't want to get fucked, but I don't want to speak. Because of my deep voice, all the teachers hear it all at once. Slowly, I move my paper a little closer, and start tickling the test-like questions with my left hand so that in the meantime she can copy the rest. She scribbles her own paper so quickly that she almost disappears from her swift gestures, and nods with a gentle smile when she's done. Fortunately, you know this has been played wisely, because if we copy the solutions from somebody, we are not driven to an 'A'. It has been done by a professional since our first paper.

After we're done, we can go out of the classroom not to be loud while there's someone who writes. Carol is one of my best friends but she can be mad at me she knows my tender-hearted perfectly, and knows I always help. But it hurts me hell to pass her exams with all my knowledge, and I'm worried about it, because at the end of high school, at the final exams, I can't be there to kick off the whole task. But giving up my red-haired best friend to study has long been abandoned. I put my arm on her shoulder, and she pulls me closer to her as I walk down the still quiet corridors, and sit in our favorite resting place, not far from the buffet, but strictly after taking in some raspberry-chocolate cupcakes.

"Have you seen Pat today?" Carol turns to me, and then slides her head a little closer to my shoulder. "Something terrible as she dressed. Did she really mean that thing in the morning?"

"I didn't see her," I reply, and I'd rather just bite another divine cake. You can usually get sneaky foods at school, but it's worth all the money.

Pat was my... I don't know what she was. My date? Is there something like this? Because I wouldn't say girlfriend. We didn't really go there to call this a relationship, just dated a few times, she just liked to walk hand-in-hand in the school. At that time, Carol was completely crazy. We were freshmen and made friends about the very first day of school. She's been my best friend in high school since then, and when Pat and I started dating, we were just out of semester exams. I don't think he liked the fact that Pat wanted to spend a lot of time with me. But then at the end of one of our dates, I took the courage and kissed her. It wasn't terrible, but it wasn't the most enchantingly enchanting first kiss of my life that I've always dreamed of. There were no fluttering butterflies in my stomach, or dry throat and trembling fingers. There was nothing. It was like, I was scared and Gemma gave me a kiss on my mouth when he promised to protect me. We were sitting on my bed, I was crying, and for a minute I didn't think this type of contact was weird. We were really little. We don't do that anymore of course, but I was not disgusted with her, because I love Gemma, but I had no strange feeling about it. Just a simple kiss, and that's exactly what Pat experienced. That was normal then. But on my date, I didn't understand why, I didn't feel something. After that, I had a little accident with one of the guys. While playing basketball, we jumped up for the ball at the same time, and as we collided, we fell to the ground. I lay on the parquet floor and he was on me. For a few seconds he didn't move, pain his feet and his head, but something inside me started to look at his light brown eyes, and as those whimpering sounds escaped through his lips... The butterflies instantly came to life in my belly. For the first time in my life. I felt like, I want touching my own to his mouth, and I was a little dizzy, and then, it came to my attention that they helped us, and escorted me to the medical room. Of course, I immediately told Carol, who embraced me compassionately, and if possible, our friendship became even stronger after she recognized it. After that, I told Pat that I didn't want to go on a date, and she was crying. I was terribly sorry for her, and in my heart I would have stayed with her just to not be sad, but since then she has been bombarded with killer looks whenever she passes by, so I don't think she would reward my 'stay with you pity' idea. And Carol has hated her ever since. He constantly criticizes her dressing, hairstyle and makeup techniques. After all, Pat is a very pretty girl.

The other two members of our small team pulled out of my mind as they huddled beside us in the midst of big laughs.

"How did the test go, guys?" Everest looks at us, and pulls Rosie on his lap. Everest, third year ahead of us, but he spends his breaks with us because of Rosie, except when it's very nice weather, because then we all go out and take our break in the yard, and while our Rosie is staring at the dripping saliva, who's also his boyfriend playing basketball with the other hot guys, while me and Carol are chatting about something else. Sports aren't really me. I mean, I'm not bad at it, or anything, but I don't particularly like it. Most cool guys are on the football, basketball, or hockey team, but I decided to learn to play the guitar when my parents told me I had to do something besides school. So this comes in hand, because sometimes we go camping with the small team in the woods, or the whole class goes somewhere in the nature to finally sleep in tents. It's really good when I can take my guitar by the fire in the evening, and while everyone sings, I can accompany them. I find it fun. Much more than sweating deadly on the football field.

"Oh, we're fine," I begin, and as I look at my answer, no one is surprised. Everyone looks at Carol with great anticipation. "So for her, too."

"Carol, it's time for you to study," Rosie says in an instructive tone, and I can't really condemn her now.

"For you to get off of me," the red-haired girl blows, and hugging my arms, she's completely up to me now. "As long as I have Harry here, I won't be in trouble."

"You'll be left with your maturity, Car," the blonde girl continues, but her voice is a little more resilient. "Harry can't fill out your final exam."

"I still have plenty of time," he shrugs and looks at the students in the hallway. I just look at Rosie's side, and while she shakes her head, Everest just smiles resignedly. That guy doesn't really like Carol, and as I have learned, it's mutual, but for Rose's sake, they tolerate each other, and I think that's very good of them.

"Hey Hazza, what are you planning for your birthday?" my other side shoots Everest, and looks at me with exactly the kind of smile that I know right away... I'm pretty sure he wants to party. "I have some ideas."

"I don't think my parents will let me go anywhere with you again," I pull my mouth. During our last outing, I was a little careless. We don't really go to parties usually, and maybe just two or three times in my life I've drunk alcohol before, but it was a rough night. I got really drunk, and after the cops took me home, I even threw up on the carpet in the living room when my mother, Robin - my stepfather - and Gemma, both in the middle of the night, tried to find out what the hell was going on.

"Come on!" Everest whispers, giving Rosie a few kisses before continuing. "Then tell them you're stay with Carol. They're never wrong with that. There will be a house party in Gary's house. His parents leave at weekend. You can sleep there to get some rest by the time you have to go home."

"I don't know..." I pull the time, because I'm not really sure it's a good idea. I'm not that kind of partying anyway. Sometimes it's okay, but Everest is increasingly trying to outsource it.

"Don't think too much!" he tells me that I still look at him, but I don't know how to tell him I'd rather stay home and watch a series after I had dinner with my family, and cut the huge cake Robin makes for me each year. I wouldn't even have the heart to step down when I know they are always prepared for it. "There's going to be a lot of chicks, we can finally pick up a girl for you."

"Why would he want any chick?" Carol moves away from me, and looks at Everest for the first time since they arrived. "I'm here for him. We don't need anyone else."

"Yeah, yeah..." the guy rolls his eyes and I know what he thinks. I also sometimes feel weird about Carol's expropriating behavior, but I also know she does it because she keeps my secret, and I'm more grateful to her than annoyed. As time goes by, the bell rings and we all start picking for the next period. "It's not forgotten, Styles. We need to celebrate your birthday."

"Okay," I smile at him for a moment, forgetting what he is nodding, then giving a quick kiss to Rosie and hurrying upstairs to his lesson, while we sit in an infinitely long and boring double history.

We walk with Car towards the bus stop, because we are going in the same direction one piece, so we wait for each other and leave together. She's chattering about me for a while, but I'm not really paying attention, just the young couple who walk past us. They both look so happy. The girl is radiant, and the boy is so proud to be his own. They hold each other's hands and the blind also see that they are in love. Perhaps I sigh a little, longing for Car to stop and for a moment she's looking in the direction I am.

"Are you listening to me, Haz?" She asks softly and I shake my head and look at her. There is no anger in her eyes, she just does not understand where I went.

"I'm sorry, I was just thinking," I apologize to her for reaching for me and tilting my head as we enter the windshield bus stop.

"About what?" She asks, and I smile at the inquisitive tone she uses. There is no anger in her for not paying attention. She's curious about where my mind is. I'm a little sorry that no one knows about this Carol. Everyone knows just a little nasty, anti-learning, 'crap to the world' Carol. I have the good fortune of a caring and sensitive girl when we are only two of us.

"What could be wrong with me?" I ask the question out loud, and now I finally get the outraged face as she steps away from me.

"What the hell are you talking about?" She frowns, which I can only grin, though the question was serious.

"Is it such a great request for me to be in love with someone so much?" I ask, and I swing my arm toward the already far-more andalous couple. Carol looks at them for a while, then turns back to me. "Big ask for someone to love? It's as if his life depended on it. That nothing and nobody matters to him. Be ready to confront your parents or even the world for our love. Because you know I would do it, too. That's what I want, Car."

"Everybody, Hazza," she finally smiles before me, and as the bus arrives, she grabs my hand and pulls after her. "You'll get your big love. Everyone gets it once. Just be patient."

"I don't know..." I shake my head as we jump into one of the two free seats. "You know, it's even more complicated than average for me."

"Oh, come on Harry!" look down at me and begin to stare out the window. Only she can sit by the window. It's a law between us. She needs to be able to stare out if she can't, listen to her hysteria. It was like she was sitting in my lap just to get that place right next to the window. Foolish girl, but I love it. "We're writing 2019. Slowly it will be normal to have some identity defect."

"I'm still worried," I mumble under my nose, but she doesn't answer. She starts to talk about how much Rosie has changed since they met Everest and that she doesn't like her anymore, so we should think about divorcing and staying with us as we did at the beginning. Just smiling, shaking my head, and then when I get to my stop, I give her a kiss on his cheek and jump the bus off.

Fortunately, I don't live far from the stop, so I can quickly get into my bed. My tests are always stressful. I'm tired, and that's why I'm a little happy that my parents are happy with just one greeting below. After a great yawn, I feel my eyes getting heavier by the time I get exhausted, but only half asleep. With all the stupid noise I turn to my other side, I give up and start staring at the ceiling. I feel so fucking frustrated and have no idea why. I have no particular reason for it. It would be so nice to have someone here just beside me who just hugs me, kisses me sometimes, and talks for a whole afternoon without even noticing the passing of time. Sometimes we would steal at each other and stray, trying to get one breath closer to the other with lost touches.

"Shit..." I sigh when I feel just the thought that triggered my pants. It is very difficult for me to suffer from tight jeans and climb only underneath under the blanket. With my eyes closed, I put my hand under my bottom to calm down until dinner. When it is, I just think of Kevin as he lay on me and whimpered so gently. As I imagine the scene, I am already very tense down there, but no matter how persistent I am, the relief does not come as quickly as usual. My hand has been moving under the quilt for about half an hour, but nothing happens and I'm just getting more frustrated.

"Shit!" I repeat my earlier silk and pull my hands out from under my blanket and hit the mattress. I'm trying to reassure myself, because I can't go down to dinner with something jerky. After P.E. lesson the guys in the dressing room recently talked about how often they watch porn on the internet lately. Although the conversation was scarce, they tended to giggle at the fact that we could find everything on such sites. I'd be lying if I said I didn't think back then that I might look up a site someday where I find gay porn. I've been to traditional adult movies before, but I haven't gotten to see it with gays yet. It may be time now.

I don't really complicate it, I'm browsing the very first page I tossed in for 'gentle gay porn'. Although it seems to me, there are more than just videos on this page. As I click on one, I almost moan loudly. It's only five minutes, so I guess that's why it starts right in the middle. I barely manage to lower it so quickly that the voice of the two guys wouldn't rush straight downstairs to mom. As I regain my attention, I watch the scene with my eyes widened and my erection tense more than ever in my life. The five minutes above the little latin guy and blonde 'love' fly unnoticed because I just looked at it with my mouth open and I couldn't understand for a second. It was cut off so suddenly that I was very angry. I would have liked to have watched them for a while, but in the excitement I gained, I step back and immediately look for another that is sympathetic. Next up is a freckled, red-haired guy and a tattooed brunette kneeling between his legs and looking at him. His hair is falling forward in the small picture, so I can't see his face, but his body is so beautiful. It's only five minutes, but I click on it. That's a thousand times better than the previous one. The tattooed guy is incredibly sexy. All his movements are erotic, and his sexuality flows. It is so dominant to freckles that it trembles. I think I imagine... I want him to do this to me. I only notice that my hand is under the blanket when I jerk, and after a perhaps too loud sigh, I biting my lips. Maybe only two minutes after the video started. Now that my quilt is over, but I still have three precious minutes left of the two guys, I'm just gently stroking myself and listening to the high tones of the tattooed. It's so erotic that I start to harden again almost immediately, so I rather quickly get out my hands under the blanket and watch the remaining thirty seconds pray that I can see it in the end. I angrily push the screen out and toss the bedding together when I cut the video, but the guy still didn't scream for enjoyment. How can they be so cruel?

"Shit..." I whimper the only word that has become my complete vocabulary since I was in my room when I see what my bed and stomach looks like and then try to fix it with a jug. I can't really let my mom know exactly what I was doing. I'm already pulling my pants back when I hear dad call me for dinner and I run down the stairs. Everyone is sitting at the table by the time I get there and slipping into the chair next to Gemma when mom looks at me.

"Washing your hands," all I have to do is moan, and roll my eyes while I go to the sink.

"Mom, I thought we could have my birthday a little earlier this year," I'll start now or never, and join them. "Carol and her family invited me to sleep over there in the evening and celebrate with them."

"Sure, you can," Robin nods, chewing a chicken on a bite. I smile because I knew he was going to be the easier case. Robin is not my real father, but I can thank him much more. Practically, he raised me. Ever since dad moved in, and for so many years now, I can count with my hands how many times we spent time together. He doesn't live in England, if I know well, he lives in a small French town with his new family. I've never seen them because daddy comes here, he takes a room somewhere and we meet. I've never been to he's new home even though Paris is one of my biggest dreams. Anything I would give you to get there once. With my love, of course. I don't want it with my almost stranger father, though if he said you would take me there, I don't think I would mind.

"We've never had your birthday separate," Mom mutters, and I see that I'm a little sad at not wanting to stay with them. Maybe I should just put it all down and tell Everest they haven't even let go of Carol.

"Come on, Anne," Robin smiles, and caresses my mum's hand resting on the desk. "He'll be sixteen. It's normal that your friends are more important than your parents. I'd be worried if that wasn't the case."

"They're not more important," I shake my head with a smile. "You will always be the most important."

"Relax, kid," Robin laughs, drawing his attention back to his plate. "You can go, just be smart."

"Of course," I blush a little as I remember the drunk incident and the way I look at them. "It doesn't happen again."

They don't answer, mom just nods with a small smile and caresses my arm, then heads off to Gemma's semester exams. She's just finishing up the first semester and luckily everyone is excited enough to completely ignore my problem.

After dinner, I help my mom wash and put the dishes in the kitchen while Gem goes upstairs to learn a bit and Robin settles in front of the TV. "What's the matter, honey?" Mom asks in a gentle voice, and as I look at the side as I wipe the plates, I see her looking with her eyes. She always see through me. She had never been depressed before, if she didn't see me immediately. I love my mom so much.

"I was just wondering when someone would love me as much as you and Robin," I reply in a hoarse voice. I love watching them. When my stepfather just thinks of nowhere and takes home a bunch of flowers from work. Or maybe he surprises mom with some jewelry. Sometimes Robin has to undertake the cleaning or, if necessary, the cooking to take some of the burden off Mom's shoulder. Random touches, hugs, kisses and kind words that you don't plan on just come and do as you please. They simply love each other unquestionably, and I don't envy this, I wish only I could live in such a harmonious relationship once.

"Oh, darling," Mom mutters, wiping her hands to hug me. "Everything will come in its own time, you know it. In time you will find a lovely girl who will make you happy. This occurs very rarely in fifteen years old boys. Do not rush anything and be patient. Great adventures await you before that. The first love that will scorch. And there are many more exciting things to do when you find the person who is Robin to me."

"I know, but still...you know," I sigh. My parents don't know what I realized next to Pat. I don't want to tell them until I find someone I will surely feel I'm not just confused, this is really my way. I know they'll understand and accept it, but I'm still excited about that conversation. Mom hugs me again, and then we finish the wrap.

"You should go for a bath and go to bed," my mom caresses and kisses me on the forehead. I'm already taller than her, a little taller, so she has to stand on her toes. "Good night!"

"For you too!" I say a little louder that until I reach the bottom of the stairs, Robin can hear me. Saying goodbye, then picking up my pyjamas which is a boxer and a loose shorts, heading for the bath at the end of the corridor. The music is still soft in Gemma's room. I don't envy because she's been studying for a long time since she was a student, and even though she was a long time ago, she's moving into the bathroom just after me. This is totally all right, at least I don't have to wait a millennium for it.

The water around me is so hot that I can barely see through the humid room and I feel it get stuck in my skin when I lie in the tub, but I love it. I really hate colds. If it was up to me, it would always be summer and at least eighty-six or ninety degrees. I close my eyes and think of mom's words. There will be someone who comes and loves to scorch. That's what he said. I know that is so. That's the way it is, and I want to be with him every minute. As soon as he touches me, it will fire immediately, and then I will be unable to resist him. The warm water is good for the dirty mind, because just enough to smooth my stomach, I feel it stiffen. I take hold of my grip and gently stroke my hand a few times for a fresh erection. A tattooed man in red crawls out of my memory before my eyes are closed, and as I am hit by an electric shock, I leap out of the tub to run to my room. I left my phone here, so I had to go back - practically without real washing - because I want to see it again. As I unlock the screen, the video I already watched jumps in front of me, but now I want another one. With the same tattooed guy. I go back to the main page, but in spite of it, I can't find any more. I don't know what the hell it frustrates me so much, but I'll be fucking nervous. Finally, I'm just angrily returning to the video I've seen to look for some info about the man. I'm sure it's not just this one movie. Oh my God, let's not just be this one! There are two names under the video, I think the actors. _Ginger Joe_ and _Tommo, the tease_. The former will definitely be the red guy, so I guess Tommo will be him. Tommo... What's your real name? Tommy maybe? Thomas... Masculine. I think it would be a good idea to think about it.

"Tommo..." I taste it a little loud, then I smile and click on the name. Throws at least twenty videos, though they are all just as short. I think my grin wraps around my head when the page subscription offer pops up in the middle of the screen. If you subscribe to the site, you can watch unlimited movies. I click on the option right away, but they immediately curious about my credit card information. I mock my mouth thoughtfully. Tomorrow I could get from mom what she usually using on the gas station. She doesn't use it for anything else, and was at the well yesterday, so for at least two weeks she doesn't notice it was 'stolen'. I should make sure you get a detailed notification. If not, I'll smuggle it back, if it does, it won't, and will think it left or something. The perfect plan! I know it's not really nice to steal some money from mom, but I just need to see Tommo's movies. For now, however, I am content to watch another five minutes, which will fly to heaven in even less time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> Here's the new chapter, I hope you'll like it.

Louis 

Oh fuck! Peter is always fucking tight around me that I can barely hold back my orgasm. I have no idea what, because half the studio went through him like a million times. I do this in quick succession, and one of the cameramen stands next to me, approaching my dick that disappears and then reappears in my partner. For a moment, I lean towards the director, who, with a well-known gesture, signals that it's time to empty the gun. I lick my mouth and deliberately kick my hips forward. Peter screams and I'm so fucking close…

"I'm gonna cum…" I gasp for my learned text and move a few more, but much slower. Just for snapshots.

"That's it!" Cries the director, then immediately pulls out of my colleague. I take off the condom and walk to my chair for a minute to drink some water before finishing.

"Come on, get ready for the final scene!" Shouts Willie. He's one of my favorite directors. I'm in the best shape of working with him. We are good friends and sometimes we go out for a beer outside the studio, or so. He has a wife of the same good head and have a daughter recently born. He invited me over for lunch and watching a match over the weekend, saying that I had to see how sweet the little girl is, and we had been watching football together for thousands of years. At first it was embarrassing to meet his wife so that she knew who I was, where and what I was doing, but then I learned from Willie how to shake off these things. How to treat it naturally. How not to be ashamed of myself. He said that those who are here rarely do it because it is their dream. The actors here all have their own fucking stories. There is hardly a bad job relationship here. I don't know about people in the studio who can't stand each other. We simply do it all because we have no choice. I was almost nineteen when I was alone. It started with a simple, "get your strength together" conversation because I wanted to tell my moms that I am gay. I thought they weren't going to have too much trouble with that, but obviously I was wrong. They told me shortly that I would take my belongings and cause nausea elsewhere. I just finished high school, for God's sake. I didn't have a penny. For a few days I didn’t even have place to sleep. To keep myself from feeling homeless, I partied in the clubs in the evenings, accepted every pipe I was invited to, and didn't leave the place until morning. Then, during the day, I was busking in parks on a blanket. One night, there was a guy I had a little more trouble with, and after four days, before we got to each other's apartment, I could finally shower. We fucked half the night and talked the rest. His name is Andy, and after all, our friendship has only grown stronger to this day. No doubt he is my best friend. There is nothing between us, but I think, one way or another, we can say that he saved my life. Anyway, what he knew helped me. His… current lover is one of the leaders of the company. At the time, he only admired the guy from afar, but somehow managed to network with him over the years. The two big bosses are a pair of twins in their forties. You rarely see them in studios. They're more of a home or office head. They are proficient in business and know very well what they are doing.

When I told Andy a bit inhibitively, but he wanted to help. He was already working here, and that was the only idea he could get out of trouble. He said I could stay with him for a few days while he was discussing this with his current ‘daddy’. And finally, he brought me home by getting me a job and home, if he suited me. Everything was on me, I was not obliged to take it. When he told me what it was all about, I thought it was better than starving on the street. I got a room in the studio building, and as it turned out, I wasn't the only one living there, not just working. At first everything was very strange. I had to go for a special medical examination and my colleagues showed me everything. They were quasi-trained in the profession. I had to try both active and passive roles, and finally they decided I was better in active, so I don't actually have a passive movie. The studio is doing quite well, especially since it has been pulling in the live section. There, everyone is entertaining a single private paying guest via the webcamera, and this genre is really booming today. I don't usually do it, somehow it works much better for me and actually pays better. The studio makes two or three long DVDs a year, which is a big thing and everyone wants to play, but the two leaders choose the actors based on their appearances in other short films and the feedback from the subscribers. Of course, these films also get extra money. I've been playing in every DVD for years, so I feel I'm in the right place, really appreciated for my work. I am safe. I have the savings to make it fun for years to come while buying a beautiful house with a really hot, two-year-old Ford Mustang on the driveway. I think my crappy parents would get a heart attack if they saw what they threw away. But I don't want to look for them.

"Fuck!" Peter moans loudly as he gets my three fingers when I’m pumping my dick to cum his ass. That was my scenario today, it would be nice to get it first as Willie imagined because I don't want to start masturbating again for another orgasm. I'm fucking tired. Or we've been doing it since eight in the morning, until three p.m. I feel my everything tingle and the camera takes every moment of my shoulder as I lean back a bit, giving it space while my sperm soaks Peter. I stroke my buttocks a few more times and Willie yells, and I get a damp cloth to clean myself.

"Tell us we don't have to retake. Today I'm very tired, I'd rather cut off my dick" sigh and Willie laugh and shake his head for thanking heaven. After I feel a degree clearer, but strictly only one degree, I drink a few more sips and even have time to look at my phone and the director shouts out.

"Okay guys, let's finish the movie!" Willie clutches his palm and walks beside me as I return to Peter's feet. He's turned around now and is lying on his back, but he still has all his semen on it and they spray a little bit of water to make him look sweatier. "Beat him, stroke him on the stomach, and we'll close with a kiss. You can do it first. I know you do. We all want to go home."

Willie goes back behind the monitor and gets us three cameras at different angles at the same time. I kneel on the edge of the bed with one of my feet and hold the guy to his feet, first to slow down, then fast and uninterrupted movements. He moans as if he's not just handcuffed, but he has two black dick in his ass at the same time, and I need all my strength not to fuck him with a laugh. I'm fucking tired, that's it, but luckily he goes away and a little "love" cuddle can come.

"That's it!" Cries the director, and we both head off in different directions as if we had never known each other. I thoroughly soak today in my shower, then it's time for me to go home. Now I have three days to rest, and death is sure I'll spend two of them lying down. I've been doing something every day for four days, and now I feel like all my strength is gone. And I did my dick completely. 

It's even hurts to sit in the car a bit, but I can hold it until home. I guess I'm not going to take the longer route today, just to drive a little. This is one of my favorite activities of the evening, and I have fallen in love with it ever since this miracle rumbles under my backside. After work, or just on my days off. If I'm not helping Andy with some stupid party, which is fortunately rare, then I get in the car and go until I'm lost and then turn on the GPS and go home. It's a little longer today because I've been playing for so long that almost all of London is in my little finger. This is an activity that is only mine. No one can come with me on these little adventures. Nobody knows about these. As well as other things that have a lot to do with me. I don't like it when people get involved in my life. Maybe I'm just protecting myself, but I won't let anyone and everyone into my privacy. It's mine, and I want to keep it to myself. Andy sometimes tries to tear me out of the snail house, but with little success. I just don't like loud and witty life. There was a time when yes. There were quite rough days back then. It also happened that I went to shoot from a party and it was really cruel. Today I have no idea how I did it, though I don't consider myself old. Anyway, I grew out of this lifestyle pretty soon. It doesn't attract me and I don't really enjoy when I rarely attend a party for Andy's sake. It can turn me off a lot and relax on work-free days by worshiping my hobbies, and in the evening I just lie on the couch and watch Netflix. I have such a stupid challenge for myself to watch a new movie every night. Something I haven't seen yet. No repetition. I have no idea how many films I have watched so far. I have been playing around since Netflix came on the market. Andy says it's pathetic to live like that instead of enjoying every moment of my youth, but he doesn't understand that I really enjoy it. This is me. Maybe it's because my job is to have sex with strangers, to get the closest physical relationship people can, so I just don't want anyone around me in my private life.

I'm just parked next to the house when my phone rings, and for a moment I look up to the sky as I close the car.

"Andy…" I mumble into the device, but he laughs out loud as if reading from my focus.

"Get dressed, Tommo," he yells into the phone, so I'm sure he's already missing the ounce of alcohol somewhere around him. "Come to…"

"Don't! Stop, Andy!" I say, and though I smile, my voice is serious, I hope he feels it. "I just got home, and it's hard to move. I'm not going anywhere. Save the monologue, my answer is no."

"You're such a fucking pussy, Louis," he growls, but I know he doesn't mind. He also knows how to shoot all day.

"Whatever," I laugh and walk into my house to make some dinner, and then finally get up from bed tomorrow afternoon. "We'll talk tomorrow, Andy. Good night!"

"Pussy!" he yells into the phone so loud that I have to pull it off my ear, but I have to grin to laugh. "Sleep well, Louis!"

Shaking my head, I end the call and decide not to cook anything today. I just make a sandwich and that's it. I don't feel like rushing in the kitchen. I really only want my mattress.

I wake up in the morning before my alarm clock. Of course, all people might think that this is dawn, but I have set the alarm seriously south, and now there are half past eleven. I fell asleep sooner than I thought, which is okay, at least I can go to bed a little more with impunity. Pushing my phone, I only browse idiot memes and funny pages, waiting for me to have the pleasure of climbing out of bedding. Too soft. It's too comfortable and relaxed to easily give up.

I think it is already two in the afternoon, and by the end, I really decide that I have had enough laziness and have a shower. I plan to go to the farm today and see Dr. Mitchell. He must have my help in his office.

As I reach the Colonel, I just say hi to everyone, and then I get three leashes off the stand and take Allie, Bobby and Princess with me. All three are mixed puppies, and I've been taking them to the park for a while, I guess it's time. The weather was nice and it wasn't raining for two days. It's not all mud to get them back to the paddocks smeared around the neck. They are running around my feet and it is definitely impossible to cut off the grin on my face. This is what makes me happy in my worst days. If I can help someone who doesn't know themselves. Be it an animal or a human. On weekdays I used to come to the farm and walk some dogs. I bring them some food to make the caretakers' job a little easier, and for a few minutes, they sniffed a little dog grin on their cheeks. There is nothing more pleasant than seeing a happy dog. I usually take them to the park and toss them a stick or ball there for hours. I run them well, so they relax much more in those tight cages. I always have a reward wall and a little more nutritious food. That's what a refuge can do when it comes to giving animals dinner. I used to buy them some bags of dogs and cat food. This isn't hard for me, but a huge help for them. They are London's largest animal shelter. They accept and treat a lot of little orphans. I just volunteer with them, but they are very grateful to me for that, and that is fine. The awareness that I'm helping.

"Louis!" I raise my head to hear my name. Sitting in the waiting room of the veterinary office next to the refuge, I had waited so far for Josh, leaning over my phone. - Why didn't you come in?

"I didn't know how busy you were," I smile at him and shake hands and hold the door to the office. "I didn't mean to disturb you."

"I did a little surgery on a cat," he begins to tell, and as a little girl follows him with a small cage in her hand, I wash my hands thoroughly, put on a nylon apron and a rubber glove so I can get closer. "Hi, Patsy. How's the little scratch?"

"He doesn't want to eat," begins the little thirteen, fourteen-year-old girl, and puts the little cage on the table, then takes out a guinea pig. "I don't know why... But he ate one last morning. I'm very worried."

"It's okay, let's see what happens," Josh assures him and begins to examine the animal. "Louis, what do you guess? He's just a little guinea pig for a few months and he doesn't want to eat."

"You know I always think the worst," I laugh, embarrassed because I don't want to give the girl a fuck, though her eyes widen and she starts to stare at Josh's every move.

"I know," he smiles, then looks up. "Could you give me that clip from the counter here?"

"Sure!" I'll cut it right away and give it. He hands the guinea pig in my hand and asks me to hold it firmly so that it doesn't jump off the table. It stretches the pet's mouth and begins to dabble with its tweezers between its teeth. To hear the metal touch them and then the pig cry a little before Josh pulls his device out of his mouth.

"There it is," he mumbles, bringing the tweezers close to his eyes to look more closely at what he had removed. "This is a tree stump. Either the litter you use underneath or the food you buy for him is not of the best quality and is mixed with this type of waste. It was drilled between his two teeth, including the gum. Every chewing could have caused the poor one terrible pain. They're not like us chewing on the other side. Saving himself from the pain, he rather ate nothing."

"Then will he be alright?" she looks up at the doctor in his forties, whom no one would say was as much. His hair is already graying at his temple, and his smile is framed by tiny wrinkles on his face and in the corners of his eyes, but... It just makes him more charming than ever. Josh is not gay, there has never been anything between us. But I have eyes. He's a really hot guy, but he does spend his days in his bachelor flat, where I've been a few times, and I wouldn't say flat, more like a palace, but he's still alone. We have a lot in common. He spends all his time here, and when he's not ordering, he's dealing with pet rescue. This is his vocation, and he says he has no time to pester a woman. Perfectly satisfying casual adventures. At least that's what he says. I don't know how true this is, or he just want to tell himself that it is. Anyway, he doesn't know what I'm doing. All he knows is that I do adult film production at a company. I never told him what my position was. I look up at Josh. He's like a wise mentor to me, so I can't tell him I'm no more than a porn actor.

"He'll be fine soon, but I'll give you some medicine," He smiles at the girl and puts the pig back in the cage, then goes to the office table and sits behind the machine to issue the bill. After the little girl goes out, doesn't call a new patient, or there's no one outside right now, I don't know, but he comes back alone and leans on the desk behind him, facing me.

"Have you think about it?" he looks at me, but I just sigh. "I really need you."

"I don't have any qualifications for this, Josh," I answer him, and I know that sounds pathetic, but I really do feel that way. I wish I was happy to get to work with Josh. "By the time I do a school... At best it's two or three years. In the meantime, you would find some perfect assistant to accompany you."

"I could hire someone on a temporary contract, and if you get the right papers, the door is open," he spreads his arms out, as if that was all. This is very tempting. I have quite a lot of money saved, and I know that I wouldn't look bad here if I was tested. It wouldn't pay as well as the studio, but I could make a comfortable living from it. But I don't really care. Mostly it would be good because... Then maybe I would be able to live a more normal life with my friends, and if I'm very lucky, I might even find someone to accompany me. There is obviously no chance of this being filmed. I'm crazy about not having to see a naked man... I usually hunt for adventures for my own purpose when I have one or two weeks off when I'm not on duty. That's when I get the last shot in a few days, and there might be some pretty boy coming up for a night. Getting in touch with someone for a long time is completely unlikely. I can't imagine having anyone who would tolerate my job as my partner. I wouldn't expect it, I wouldn't be able to. And frankly... I'm fine alone. There are no tantrums, no relationship dramas. I don't want these, so I didn't really think about moving. It has only come to my mind sometimes since Josh has been bothering with this thing. It was about a month ago that he first came up with the idea of needing an assistant next to him and seeing the potential in me, but I can't work on it with just a high school degree. So it's not that simple. It would make a huge difference in my life. I have no idea if I'm ready for any changes around me. "You didn't even think about it, admit it!"

"I did, but…"

"Wouldn't it be better than what you're doing now?" He looks at me with narrowed eyes and hands. "You're not a teenager anymore. I don't think your bosses will be employed at the age of forty, and if so, well... Old people aren't that popular in porn."

"What?" I look at him with wide eyes and he smiles only sympathetically. There was an all-knowing glitter in his eyes, and now I'd love to sink in shame. "From where...?"

"I wasn't sure, but I think my sense was good," he says softly, but he doesn't look me in the eye. I don't hear contempt in his voice, and it calms me down a bit, but I don't know how to react. "One thing's for sure. I don't want you to be ashamed of me, okay?"

"As if it were just like that..." I roll my eyes and pull off the gloves and then throw it in the trash. With the same vigor, I hang the apron on the hook I took it from, but Josh pushes himself off the counter and prevents me from heading for the door.

"Don't run away," he asks kindly, and smiles at me. He step one towards me, then hug me to finally step away from me and jump into his chair. "You were a terrible juvenile, there is no one who doesn't understand why you ended up where. I won't condemn it for a second, but I have recommended you a way out of it because I want to help you... Live a life like anyone else."

"Thank you, Josh," I say to him, but perhaps more excitement mixes with my voice than I would like. "But I don't need to live like others. I've already reconciled to it, I'm not ashamed of what I am. I live better than my graduate parents will ever, and that's enough to know I'm in the right place."

"Nice words, Tommo..." his sentence really shocks, because it immediately reveals to me that you've seen it. Not only did he guess he knew exactly what my job was, because he saw one of my films. I have nausea because of this thought. Never before had a friend other than Andy ever seen anything. Or if so, he never rubbed it under my nose, so now it was a huge bucket of ice water in my neck.

I'm leaning over his desk and my brain can't comprehend how that happened. I just shake my head and pray that the ground could open under me.

"Shit, Louis. That was not my intention. I didn't want to make you that much."

"I'm fine..." I mumble, but still unable to make meaningful sentences and gestures. I can't even look at the man in front of me. Finally, I try to get off the table so I can get out of here, but it stands in front of me.

"You stay!" He orders me and pulls my arm into the room, then sits down in his wheelchair office chair and pulls the little surgical stool beside me so he can sit down. "Now, let's just put the thing we talked about, just promise me that you really think carefully about my offer."

"Okay," I say softly, but I don't look at him. I'm embarrassed to see my work. This is much more embarrassing, even if you only knew about it. "How did you find it out?"

"Unclear?" He laughs and grabs a used surgical drape from the table to throw it into the sink as a diversion. "I was looking for porn."

"Gay porn?" I raise an eyebrow, and now he's the one who is embarrassed and even blushes next to him. He pushes out the chair and, back to me, starts packing something on the counter.

"My interest is quite… wide-ranging," he replies, finally laughing embarrassingly. He turns back to me and continues with an apologetic expression on his face. "If I say I watched you, you really run out the door, don't you?"

"Fuck, Josh…" I shake my head and slowly get up from my chair. "It's just… so fucking bizarre, you know?"

"Take it much looser," he says, smiling half-heartedly at me. "At a college party, my roommate fucked his girlfriend in our coliseum. Three steps from my bed. And we're still good buddies. I'm not a prude, and I beg you not to behave any more after that. Just treat it loosely."

"Asshole," I grin, and from the way he handles the one thing, I really manage to let go of the tension that this fucking situation generated in me. "So not just girls, huh?"

"Not just chicks," he replies, looking out into the waiting room. When no one is found outside, he closes the outside door and flips the table, then comes back and starts packing his stuff, and I help disinfect all his equipment and the entire office.

"You never said" I keep pushing to talk about this because there was never a topic between us, even though he knew I’m gay.

"There was nothing," he replies simply as he puts down his cloak and puts his jacket on his shirt. "I've never been with boys. Only womens."

"But why?" I snort, and seeing my smile, he smiles as he drives out the building through the back door and heads towards the parking lot.

"I don't know, Louis," he says after a moment of silence. "I've never been brave enough, I think. I don’t know."

"I see," I nod and take out my car key, just like he did. "If you think we should meet for a beer sometime, we can talk about it. If you would like, of course. Anything."

"With one condition," he nods to me with his keys, and now there's a much cunning grin on his face. "If you think carefully about my offer."

"Alright!" I laugh and walk towards my baby parked two cars away. "Then I'll come and discuss it."

"Good evening, Louis!" He says goodbye, and I greet him and get in my car. It was already getting dark so I could start my favorite evening program. To go until I get lost. I'm emptying my brain, I don't even want to think about what happened in the surgery right now. Just look at the lights, get stuck in some evening traffic jams when I can smile and listen to the horns of impatient people, and just passing step by step, get lost in the city just as deep in my mind and turn on the GPS to take me home. I should get to bed in time today because I want to get up early on Saturday. In the morning I can go to the weekend homeless kitchen to worship my other hobby. Every weekend when I have time and I'm not working, I'm there. I help prepare the food and then distribute it to the homeless or in need. I've only been on the street for a few days, yet it has left such a profound impression that it is like having nowhere to go that I just want to help them. If I don't know more, then I give food to everyone who comes there. It is terrible to see how many there are and some are so young. Most people judge, but we don’t know their story. We don’t know why they were forced into the street. Maybe they can't, like I couldn't. Maybe they can… But it doesn't matter, just the fact that they are suffering, and if I can help, why wouldn't I? This will not make me holy. I'd rather just be a little selfish because I do it for myself, not just for them. As I help, I also feel better. My soul is lighter and it makes my survival easier.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Guys!   
I was a little lost because I was on a big trip, but I'm here again. :)   
Love,   
Sophie

**Harry **

After I managed to steal Mom's credit card, I decided I'd be the best to start with a three-month subscription right now, because Mom gets a full breakdown of her spending, and I'm sure I'll have to put somewhere the card as if it were stolen or something. I wanted to avoid all of this, so I searched Tommo's videos very carefully on the net, and I even asked Carol for the password for her torrent site, though I don't like to use it, but if I can find his movies there, it's worth it. Nowhere. There were a few pages where it was uploaded, but the quality was terrible. That's not enough for me. I got to see this guy in HD. I haven't been able to watch all his movies yet, and I don't really want to get caught. Little by little. There are many, so I still have time, but if I look at them all too soon, what's left for me? I searched for him on community sites, but couldn't find anything. He doesn't even operate any pages under his pseudonym, for... Fans? Do pornstars have fans? Or am I just so stupid? I don't know, but yes, this man soon becomes addictive. I have to see, but there are no more options. So the videos stayed. Today he's back in line with that red-haired boy. As I watch Tommo undress him naked with a cheeky grin on his face, it's not just my pants that are starting to tighten, I'm nervously gnawing at my mouth. I know this is such an idiot fucking thing, but I'm jealous of that guy. I hate how Tommo looks at him... He touches him the way I wishes he could. It makes me angry that wherever I look for him I run into reefs everywhere. It's just as if it doesn't exist, just here on the porn sites. Couldn't it be just a terribly realistic Japanese sex robot? That's impossible, isn't it? Although then maybe I could buy one for myself. I do know, however, that a robot wouldn't be enough for me. I have no idea who this boy is having more videos with, but not really with the others, but the way he treats him... I just feel like a really jealous flame is burning in me that is about to burn everything and completely take my mind off. Still, I just swallow it and try to drive it away. I have my hands in my pants and I move it on myself slowly. I want to cum when he does. Right at that moment. I see that Everest's little message window pops up, but I close quickly and continue what I've done so far. We are already so damn close. I can see it on his face. I have watched five films so far and already recognize the signs. His movements will be shakier and he will often raise his head to the ceiling, sweeping his hair out of his eyes, which stuck to his sweaty forehead. The muscles in his arm tighten because he holds the other so tight and again I imagine I am the one who he holds. No one has ever touched me like this. I close my eyes and only listen to the sound of enjoyment through the headphones as I throw my phone next to me and try to go into a handkerchief so that I do not have to change bedding again.

After I have calmed down so much that I could have wiped away the blur from my belly, I open Everest's message.

"Don't come here, you stupid!" I start frustratedly on the phone as I answer it.

"Do you think your dad will give you the car?" He asks, but there is really no stress in his voice. "Saturday night there are a lot of roadside checks and you can't drive legally for another year."

"I know," I answer him, rolling my eyes. I hate being able to drive for a long time, but I can't. A lot of thoughtless cattle can find their way on the road with permission. "I'll tell my mom I'll go by foot. You wait around the corner for the car."

"Okay," he replies simply, and I hear him talking to Rosie in the background. "We'll pick Carol up first, then I'll write if we're around the corner."

"Okay, by the time I get ready" I climb out of bed and throw my phone on the mattress. Previously, we had dinner with the family and ate my cake. I don't think they got really bad about leaving tonight. Mom was reconciled to her, and I'm a big boy. I'm officially sixteen today, so she has to get used to sometimes going out with my friends.

Soon, after a message comes from Rosie's cellphone saying they are here, and I will run off the floor.

"I'm leaving" I give a kiss to Mom's face and walk down the hallway for my shoes. I didn't want to dress up anything extra. Mom would surely have notice it. I stay with jeans, t-shirts, gym shoes as I do on any other day. The others, however, went much further. Rosie was incredibly hot in the leather pants she was coming in, and Carol hadn't left it to chance with her miniskirt covering everything and anything.

When we get to the house, Everest gets everyone a glass of vodka most likely mixed with a little juice. It smells like mango, then holds it up, and we all clink with red plastic cups.

"Happy birthday, Harry!" he yells and we all drink some big sips. Gary wasn't fine tonight either. There are so many people in the house, the music is really roaring, and the bottles are almost endlessly lined up on the counters. Carol grabs my hand and we go a little further in the house. Everest swaps the empty cup in my hand for a full one, but this one contains orange blended vodka. It will soon be replaced with a vodka cherry, then a glass of damn strong scotch. I don't really like it, which is why I recognize it right away, but all I have is that I don't really care what they give me. Everything's good. Carol is so tight to me as we dance, that I feel my shirt sticked on my skin, because I am sweating so much. I feel like some fresh air would come in handy, but I'm really dizzy, so I'd be reluctant to let Carol go. She seems a lot smarter than me because she didn’t drink that much as I am so she can hold me real strong, but all of a sudden I feel gravity working against me because I'm almost fall when I realize Everest is pulling my shirt.

"What now?" I growl at what he is giggling about here and have no idea where we are going because I do not have the strength to resist. I just let him pull me over to another room, where a smaller team clashed in one corner of the room. They sit on the carpet, almost in a regular circle, and only see what happens when we get to it. Rosie is already sitting in the circle, making room for the three of us when she sees us. People sitting here around an empty wine bottle, so I guess we'll play. I have always loved this game, although to be honest, I have never chosen boldness, I always stay true because I have no problem with it. And I really enjoy watching others make stupid things. Everest shoots me, and as I look down at him, a fiber, previously lit cigarette, gives me.

"No thanks," I waved my hand but didn't rest. Try it in front of my face. "No need, Ev!"

"Eat then!" He put a half plate of chocolate cookies in my lap, which looks too fucking good to not taste. I have no idea who baked it, but something cruelly delicious, and I'm pushing the fourth before Rosie grabs the bowl from my hand.

"Jesus, are you bloody mad?" she rivals me, though I have no idea what the hell is wrong. Carol might be right, and she's really starting to get out of her mind near Everest.

"Come on, at least you're feeling good," my buddy grins at me, triggering a disapproving headache from his girlfriend.

The game starts and I enjoy it more and more with each spin. It is also starting to be terribly funny as the glass spins on the overly thick carpet, before Everest shoots me again to offer it with a cigarette. I think about it, and then I wonder why not? Today I was sixteen, and as a celebration I can really afford not to be as good a boy today as I always have been. I take it away and sniff a deep while Ev leans over my ear.

"Don't let it out right now," he breathes, and his lips rub my ears a little. As I look at him suddenly, his eyelids lowered and he looks up at me with a lazy smile. I feel the tingling in my dick as he stares at me now, and obviously my eyes widen to the size of a plate, then coughing let the smoke from my lungs into his face. He just laughs at it and then offers it again, now by taking it out of his own mouth and holding it between his fingers, without sucking it in without taking it from him. It probably doesn't mean anything to him, but for me the whole situation is very erotic and I feel like I'm rooty with Everest. He turn me on. After I suck his cigarette in with his fingers touching my lips, he laughs and starts watching the game, but I feel my face burn from what just happened. Between us and in my pants. I want to pop out to get to the bathroom, but I can't do it and fall back to where I just sat and start laughing out loud, like the funniest moment in the world, and those around me join me.

"Harry! Your turn!" cries one of our classmates, and as I look forward I see the mouth of the glass facing me. I grin, wipe my tears, proof of my great laugh, and look forward to spitting me out. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare!" I cut at him almost without thinking. According to them, the same girl who talked to me before will give me a task. I can feel my friends staring at me and when I look around, the two girls fall down and Everest looks at me with a proud grin.

"That's great!" applause... Lisa, I think that's what she is called, and she seems to be very lively in her mind, so suck it up and look at the house. "I got it! Get your pants down, go to that blonde chick and invite her to a date."

"You mean..." I would start because he was speaking so fast that I could barely grasp what he wanted from me, but the cheering of the crowd interrupted.

"If you do this, Styles, I'll even pay you at least... fifty pounds!" cries Gary, the host, but I still don't understand. I lean to the side and whisper in Everest's ear, asking if I understood the task well, and he nods with an idiot grin. I wonder if it's worth it to me, but now I'm somehow so relaxed, obviously out of the crowd, that I actually only see the value of the whole thing, and I move, hearing Carol sigh frowning. I unbutton my jeans that make everyone whistle, and as I walk behind the younger girl, I push my thigh down with my underwear and then tap the blonde-haired girl's shoulders. As she turns around, she doesn't see the whole situation yet and I can barely make it without laughing.

"Would you like to go out with me some time?" I'm crushing it quickly and stepping back on stage, then pointing myself. The girl follows the path of my hands, and when she sees that my waistline is a little incomplete, she gazes up into my eyes in horror and looks at me in disgust.

"Jerk!" she spits at me, then turns around to leave.

"Don't you like the sight or what's wrong with you?" I yell, but I almost drown in my laughter as I pull back my clothes. Everyone breaks out of laughter as I want to sit back, but my red-haired girlfriend leans in and starts pulling me towards the kitchen. "Wait a minute! Gary owes me!"

I pull my arm out of her grip and start back, but I run into Kevin. To the guy who made me realize I'm gay. My breath stops for a moment, but I apologize very quietly and avoid getting to my host partner.

"Give me my money, Gary!" I laugh at him and he shakes his head with his fifty pounds. I think this will come in handy. I turn back to feel someone gently pull my arm, but I know it's not Carol. It's a warm and much bigger hand. Kevin leans close to me, even though I don't know what the hell to do. I'm tall, but he is taller than me, so he leans almost to my neck, which makes my heartbeat stop for a moment.

"Will you come up with me a little?" He whispers, before I know that I moan louder than I should, because he smiles and starts to pull me away. “I take it as a yes.”

"Harry! Don't do this, you'll regret it." Carol trying to pull Kevin away from me, the girl I thought was my best friend. Why do she want to stand between us now? Whatever Kevin wants upstairs, I think I want it so bad, and my whole body is on fire if I can imagine. "Come on, let's go out and breathe a little, then dance."

"Give me a break!" I tell her what I wanted and start to look at me. I know she once said, I'm scary when I shout, thanks to my deep voice. "You're in my ass all the time! Get off me a little bit and find yourself hanging around! I'm busy…"

"Fuck you!" push me a little to make me fall to Kevin, but he holds me by the arm and starts laughing, and pull me upstairs. I still don't feel too much myself... The house is moving around me a little and I'm fucking thirsty, but I don't want to running away for a glass of water right now, I'd rather dry up. I need to know what Kevin wants upstairs with me. Maybe this is  _ the evening _ ? Maybe Kevin is gay too, just didn't know about it? I'm not sure what's going on right now, because he jumps in to see that he has a girlfriend and makes my eyebrows grow slightly as we get up and close and then turn the lock on the door. With a sly smile he leans against the door and pulls me to what I leave as a rag doll. He doesn't kiss me even though I thought so. I trusted him to do it, stick it to my neck and suck it hard, which I am forced to moan. I can't hold my voice, I try in vain, and it's both irritating and scary. Is it possible?

"Go to bed, kitty," he growls in my ears, which makes me swallow, and my body shakes. "It was so irritating that you were teasing that girl with your erect dick. That was how it erected… in PE class. Or even better…"

"From where?" I'm trying to get some air, so he knows my secret, but it's hard, he just laughs at me.

"Harry, I lay on you, remember?" he grins at me and caresses his pants, lightly gripping him, causing my dick to pop right in my pants. "Truth or dare?"

"What?" I ask, almost gasping for desire, what the hell is going on between us, but he just caresses himself and looks at me.

"Choose one!" he asks, then tilts his head, waiting for an answer. I'm confused if I don't want to continue playing. What the hell did he do? Of course I want to! I want everything Kevin wants to do to me, and I confess this easily to myself.

"Dare," I breathe in front of me and his mouth reaches as he pulls his phone out of his pocket.

"I was hoping you would choose this," he replies hypocritically, coming two steps closer, but still too far to reach him at all. "I dare you to rub off. Here in front of my eyes. It would be amazingly exciting…"

I don't answer him, just blink a few, then slowly move my hand toward my pants. I don't know what I have, I didn't think I would, but I want to. I want to do it so damn hard and I want him to see it. To look at me. I slip off my pants on my feet, but I don't take off my shoes so I leave the jeans with my underwear at my ankles. I hear Kevin breathing loudly, which makes me more excited than ever.

"Tell me what to do," I ask him, making him groan and come even closer. His phone is in his hand, and it's like he's shooting me, and my dick throbbing in thought.

"Lie down on the bed," he orders me softly, and I'll do what he says. I lie down, push myself up a little, and try to put on a pose that may be sexy, but the camera sees the point. "Treat yourself. Close your eyes and enjoy what you do."

I sigh a lot, but I'm not gonna grab my erect, and I'll do it if he asks for it, instead of just treat it with my fingers or rubbing my palms gently. I don't have to play it to enjoy it, it's really good. I wish he did it. Should I ask for it? He said it would bother me to satisfy myself in front of him, so he probably want this from me, I don't want to oppose it because it's so damn good to have Kevin, a terribly sexy guy, and watch me masturbate. And he enjoys, I can hearing it in his breaths. It doesn't sound different, but that's enough for me.

"Grab it!" He growls, and I smile a little. I open my eyes and see that he has pushed his pants down and does exactly the same thing like me. As I grasp the base of my erection, I straighten it fully and see it lift the camera closer and then take it away. "Cum in front of me."

I moan uninhibitedly from his sentence, and as I begin to lean towards orgasm, his hands begins to move so quickly that I am sure he will cum much sooner than I do. I'm going to be right about that very soon, because with a few hissing noises, he splashes the floor in front of me and licking his mouth waiting for me to finish. From the look of my body, it doesn't take much to follow him and splash all my pleasures on my belly.

"Taste it," he asks softly, and I'm uncertain for a minute. I've never done this before, and it sounds a bit bizarre.

"What?" I want to sit up or something, but he holds out his hand to stop me.

"Just a lick," he says in a sultry voice. Okay, just a lick. Obviously it won't be bad. What the hell could be wrong with me? I pull my fingers down my stomach and lift it to my mouth and lick my finger, then put it in my mouth to suck it out, not that bad taste. Really not bad, and suddenly Tommo comes to my mind. What a taste of his. He sprays a lot and now I really want it to happen, leave some sticky marks on my body and I feel like I can harden again. The man enchanted me through some movies that if I think about it, that's enough. It makes me sick. Kevin puts his phone away and hands me a handkerchief while he wraps himself back in the jeans. "You were wonderful, kitty. We could repeat it sometime."

"Certainly it will be," I reply with all my fears undressed, and by the time I get dressed, he is no longer in the room. My head swirls and projects Tommo's face in front of my eyes. That man is so beautiful. God, I wish I knew his real name. Or just know where to look. I could write him an email or something. But so... I have no chance, and it is frustrating.

The light painfully burns my eyes, even through my eyelids, and as I move my head, it engulfs in a pain that I have never felt in my life. I whimper a little at my side and reassure myself that I am at least definitely in bed and alone. Then, after all, it can't be that big. I turn to the side and slowly try to open my eyes so that the daylight does not burn my retinas. I feel terribly shit and I can't remember what happened last night, but I perfectly remember where I am and why. Kevin and I came up here and... Oh my goodness! It's like I was just dreaming about the whole thing. Just like when you try to revive your dream, but it is trying to wipe it out with the wind. Well, that's exactly the feeling. Only moments jump in. As Kevin sticks in my neck... Then, as he asks, to lie on the bed and do what he says. Jesus... I was masturbating in front of Kevin's eyes. This cannot be true.

Slowly and very carefully, I get out of bed and start looking for anyone who is with me. Let's say Everest would be nice because he brought me here and I'd be happy to him to take me home.

"Harry!" Rosie exclaims and approaches me, seriously frightened, but my biggest problem is the throbbing pain in my head. "Where the hell were you? Carol said, you quarreled and you were gone. She went home late at night."

"Shh" I close my eyes and I ran my hand through my hair, trying to unbutton my tinctures, which is not that easy in the morning. "My head hurts a lot."

"Are you okay?" my face smoothes out before I can gently open my eyes. His voice is not so overpowering anymore, and for that I am grateful to her.

"Not really," I answer frankly, and start grinding my throat because I feel damn dry. Rosie grabs my hand and gently leads me to the kitchen where she pours me a big glass of water. "Thanks."

"You shouldn't have eaten so much of the weedy cookie, and then you even sucked on a little extra. It's not you, Harry." She shakes her head and I see that she is angry, but I am stuck with what she said. "You could have been in a trouble. You know how worried I was all night?"

"What?!" My eyes widen and I begin to assemble the tiny pieces of my disintegration last night. Everest damn bowl of chocolate cookies... And then the cigarette, which it seems like it wasn't cigarette. "Fuck!"

"You did not know?" She raise an eyebrow and I feel more and more angry.

"Yes, Rosie, I smoke it up every day, so I know I have weed in the cookie!" I scold her and she looks at me with open lips. I was too rude. I know I am, but I'm so damn angry with Everest. He knew, and he didn't speak directly. He had to know that I wouldn't do that, so he played it. I seem to have brilliantly good friends. Carol resentfully stepped offended and he stiffed. That's great! "I'm sorry, Rosie."

"Come on, Ev is home, he's completely broken up, so I took him home, but I came back to see if I could find you." She's incredibly kind to me for coming back for me, and I don't know what to say. I'd rather just go and get in Everest's car, and I think I wouldn't mind if I accidentally throw up in it.

On the way home, Rosie took me to a pharmacy where she bought me a painkiller and a bottle of water, which she says makes me look much better, but she also made me know that I stink, and if she's put me home, everyone will know I was partying, so she decide to stop at their house first. Allows me to shower. Fortunately, her parents are not home, they went to a birthday party with her little sister. After I'm done and take my clothes back, the scent of the man's deodorant comes out and I look at her questioningly.

"Daddy's," she shrugs, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "Someone could have spilled something on you because you smelled of alcohol. But don't spend too much time with your moms. Tell me you have to go to the bathroom or something and change quickly."

I'm just nodding to her attention and thanking her for the disposable toothbrush I received to be in almost perfect condition by now.

She unloads in front of the house and drives away quickly before my mom see they are brought me home from a neighboring street.

"I'm here," I open the door, and luckily no one's downstairs, but I hear the washing machine going, so they must be home. I hurry upstairs and see my mom in the hallway coming out of the bathroom. "Good morning! I have to run in there!"

"You too!" Responds with the same emphasis, fortunately she seems to be in the mood for a gambler. "Run!"

After I throw down my clothes, I shimmy into my room to pick something clean and then go back downstairs. Starving. I need something, and I think I could kill for it.

"Are you all right, honey?" Mom turns to me as a piece of bread hangs out of my mouth as I try to make sandwiches from the rest. "Your eyes are very red. Won't you get sick?"

"I'm fine," I reply quickly, and I'm sure the reason is the weed, but maybe if I sleep a lot, everything will be the old. The roar in my head could finally stop. "We talked with Carol until dawn in the living room and watched movies. Only sleepless. I think I'll take a nap. I'll do my homework later tomorrow."

"All right," she replies, but I see the concern in her eyes. She don't quite trust my words that I'm okay. "But if you still feel like you're not doing well, then tell me I'll give you something."

I don't answer, I just put my sandwich on a plate, and after giving her a kiss on her face, I hurry upstairs. I seem to have escaped this crap ocean for which Everest is responsible.

I'm already in my bed, and I'm taking a little nap when I write a message to Carol. Now that I calmed down a bit, I was able to rethink last night and I was pretty jerk with her. But she just wanted to take care of me when she obviously knew I was in it. It's quite clear that only I didn't know that. Maybe it really would be best if I didn't go to more parties. Everest is a good friend, but when he’s high or very drunk, he's always put me in trouble. I don't want this. I just want to live the high school life everyday, I think. Carol does not answer, and I start to enchant the ceiling while waiting for the dream, and as I approach it, I think. Everything. About who I am and what I am. But mostly what I want. Love. I am so fucking anxious to be in love with someone. Someone who's handsome. Who is strong and I can trust him, but he knows he can count on me. Someone who's masculine. Who's damn manly. God like him. Tommo… I involuntarily sigh as I remember and immediately start wondering how I should search the Internet.

By the time I notice myself, my ear-piece is already in my ear and I go to the website I have subscribed to, to find a movie with it that I have not seen before. When I see him on the screen, the saliva runs into my mouth, my throat dries and I have to swallow a lot. Tommo is so damn perfect!


	4. Chapter 4

**Louis **

Everyone laughs loudly in the room as I walk back to my chair wiping my tears to drink some water. I don't know why I do it all the time. I think I drink about three liters of water on one day of shooting. I have a theory that I replace it with cigarette because we can't really get dressed and go out for a bit. Better to say, someone's does it, but I'm not one of them. I like to stay indoors and move on with the movie as quickly as possible. Today I'm working with Andy and Richard is directing us. Richard is not one of my favorites because he's pretty raw. There are moments when I think, unintentionally but relentlessly make you felt, who you are, what your job is and how much you are worth. Other times, he is fully involved in the joke as he is today, and with Andy, you can't help but laugh. I swear he is the only guy in the world who can enjoy filming a porn movie just as much as working with the world's most famous director and biggest Hollywood star. If he feels something is not okay, he's simply yell to stop or start laughing. I don't want to believe he can love his life so much, but I wish I could be in his skin. Even when I'm just in his company, I giggle, what if I could live a little bit of his life? He just quipped because he said I fucked up the scene and looked like mating kangaroos. I don't know what it looks like when they fuck because I've never watched a movie like that in my life, but so I know that Andy has an extensive knowledge of the sexual habits of the animal world. One thing I was absolutely not curious about.

"Now that we've finished kangarooing, can we finish the movie?" I walk back, still grinning beside the bed, before my thighs kick. "I'm tired…"

"Don't start!" He raises his index finger and raises my eyebrows because I don't know what I said wrong. After five hours of fucking, it's normal to feel exhausted. "We're going to drink tonight, and if I have to tie you up and then take you to the bar in my luggage, you'll still be drinking!"

"Ah, shit..." I drop my head back dramatically for a moment, but then I kneel on the bed and watch him lie down on his back and then lay under me. Our previous position, I think he didn't really has this as a favorite, and Richard's such a cool man that he gives us a relatively free hand. He doesn't tease often. If we have our own ideas and it looks good on the screen, we can do anything. That's why hi is Andy's favorite. "Okay, I'm going. But just because I had promised before."

"That's right!" Licks his mouth as he looks up at me. "Ethan's coming too. He's still completely clicked on you. You should take him home because he's a pain in my ass. If he could see how small your dick is, he would get off of me."

"Great…" I roll my eyes. Ethan is a guy a few years younger than me, and comes completely from the kind of gay class I can't and I don't intend to identify with. That "on pride spinning his cock" kind of gang is his. Thank you, I'm not asking for it, but if I were straight and would do it at single parties, neither would I, and I've told Andy so many times. "This won't happen today. I'd rather take someone with me, but you won't instigate me like you did last time!"

"Let's get started!" Richard screams at us, so I'm all the way to Andy a little rougher than I usually grin, so he knows exactly why he got it. It's interesting how much I enjoy working with him, regardless of my best friend. Andy is a professional and nobody can deny him that. No annoying nasal sounds or screams. It's completely natural, and when we're together, it just works. No chemistry. There wasn't really the first time we had private sex, but I know for sure that Andy is fucking good. It never occurred to him that there could be more than friendship. I think we both thought the other was just an adventure. It is so natural among us that Andy still ranks among his best ones when it comes to company. Of course, there are others in front of me, he always remembers me this, but I usually arrange it so much that he tells me not to get high.

"Okay, don't stop, if the tap is gone, turn over your left foot and grab his waist. Speed up the pace." Give the instructions Richard, then the hitting board disappears from our face and I'll do what he said. I can feel Andy straining at me every time I penetrate, and from there I start moving towards my orgasm, which of course he knows. I slap him in the ass and he moans and smiles at me, but he doesn't stop, so I decide on another solution. I'm not going to let him decide again, and he'll be punished for having Ethan recruited today. I move my hips a little bit and get my care from a different angle, he closes his eyes for a moment. I'm sure it wasn't a play that I grin and torture until he finally begs to grab my thigh but it's late... He cums on the sheet and Richard shouts. I know that if I do, he can't stop it because it soars from the sensation, but he sprays all over it in no time. Louis one, Andy zero. I'm gonna wear off his little buddy today, too, and then this will lead me by two...

"You're such a dick!" Push me as he walks past me to wipe himself while they change the bed sheets to a similar one. "So now we have to stay at least half an hour longer. Is that good for you?"

"Always with you, baby," I wink, then sniff out a smile and shake his head. I drink as usual and send a message to Josh. I have no idea how much he will prefer my idea, especially at the last minute, but it's worth a try. If I tell him I was thinking, and even though I haven't decided yet, his offer is very promising, maybe he would be willing to play tonight as my date. Then I'd get away with Ethan…

We'll not even start the scene again when he's already responding, and he's in it very happily. Very enthusiastic. Maybe I should really try to outsource it to a little play. In light of the things that have come to light, maybe he wouldn't mind that much. Plus I can protect him from Andy this way because he climbs on everyone who's moving and hasn't yet been sitting on whom cock.

"If you do this again..." he begins, but I slam into the side as I put down my phone and I go to bed with him.

"I'm not my own enemy," I laugh and stroke myself a little because my dick is really tired. Even miracles are ran out after so many hours of massive fucking. "But you deserved it."

"Fuck you!" he grumbles and, with a little outside help, manages to pick up the pose he needs, and then they start adjusting me to the last scene.

"I was already there," I reply simply, and wait for us to begin. "I'm not asking for more of you today."

"Come on!" The director instructs us to continue where we left off. There's really not much back from here. Maybe two or three poses, then a three minute pause, until I take off the condom and pretend it wasn't there and then cum on Andy's chest. He liberally wipes his finger and licks it, then takes me in his mouth as he tries to satisfy himself. I figured it wouldn't be easy for him right now after my previous action, so I decide to get some reparation and kiss him a little. Andy loves to sell himself to an insensitive and phlegmatic guy, but he's not. Kissing can make him totally feverish, and now I give everything in order to get off seriously today.

"I thought you would never cum" I laugh as we head for the shower. He slaps me back and hits my hips.

"Dickhead!" He giggles as he stops under the hot water and presses the shower over his hand. "Do you know how difficult it was? But your tongue... Well it's still golden. No matter where you go with it."

"Thank you for this Andy's non-casual praise." I grin and we both quickly take a bath. We're not planning on going home anymore. On the one hand, because Andy is sure if I put my foot in my house, I will not be leaving today, and he is undeniably right. On the other hand, it doesn't make sense. It's too late. The parties are getting started recently. I still managed to get us to sit in a bar today, because I just don't have the urge to do anything else, but he chose a fancier breed just to be good at it if he had to let me go.

I had a meeting with Josh in front of the bar, and when we got there, my sense of well-being did not disappoint. He is patiently waiting a few steps from the entrance. Josh is a good friend, but I have to admit we've never met outside the office. This is the first time I am surprised to see it in such a loose outfit. He's wearing a simple blue jeans with a black t-shirt, with only a half-zipped burgundy sweater. When he sees me, a huge smile spreads over his face and hides his phone in his pocket. Fortunately, Ethan is not here yet, so I can initiate my doctor friend into my plans.

"Lou!" He hands me a decent hand and tries to hug me quickly before I get to Andy. "Hello…"

"Josh, come with me to the restroom, please." I'm whisper quietly, then let go and stand next to him. "Andy, this is Josh, the veterinarian I've told you a lot about."

"Yes… Just not enough," he replies with an eyebrow raised, and he's already giving his hand. "I'm glad to meet you!"

"Me too!" Josh responds immediately with a big smile as I reach for him and pull him over to the bar. Andy follows us and leans over my shoulder just behind him. "Do you order some drinks? We're coming soon."

"Yeah," he whispers to me, and I know the sound perfectly. He see through me. He knows exactly what I'm doing, though that doesn't bother me. The point is that Ethan will finally land on me.

"Everything is alright?" Josh asks as we step into the overly bright washroom. This is sure to discourage you from coming here to fuck. It kills every mood and even burn out my eyes when I'm sober, not if someone is drunk. "You look nervous and I think you want to say something because you didn't really ask me if I needed a toilet."

"Sorry." I laugh and lean my head on the counter. "I'd like to ask you a favor."

"That will happen too," he grins, washing his hands. - "You give me power, Lou. Second thoughts?"

"Thoroughly," I moan and wait for him to finish looking at me. "Andy's buddy has been clicking on me for a thousand years. One would think that after one hundred and twenty-seven refusals, his pride would begin to work, but that does not seem to be the case. This is a reason to me that he shouldn't be The guy, but that's not the only one."

"I see," he replies, stretching the end of the word a little, then folds his arms and waits for the continue. "I hope you don't want to sew him around me if you want to get rid of him so much."

"No, of course not!" I laugh awkwardly. "I want to sew myself around you."

"Oh," he is surprised, and that's really honest. For a moment, even his smile disappears, but it quickly returns to his face. "You mean let's play we're together?"

"No!" I save what can be saved immediately. I knew it so much I shouldn't have pulled Josh into it, but I had no better idea. "It's enough to just do some dating. Relax, nothing serious."

"I'm calm, Lou," he leans a little closer and his smile is playful. I seem to have misunderstood the situation. He received it much looser than I thought. "You're a nerve wreck. Relax. I rarely date such cramped people."

I don't answer anything, just smile and nod. He holds his fist at me and touches mine and we start off among the partying people. By the time we get to the table, I'll see Ethan. He's not ugly anyway. He has dark hair, which he always adjusts so carefully that no single strand disrupts the overall picture. He always do the perfect job. And really good. But he just repels so much. Immediately it bounces as you see it and jumps into my neck. I flick his back just a little with one arm and feel Josh tie our fingers together in the other hand and then start to pull it gently out of the hug.

"Who is he?" he leans over to me with a lovely smile and pulls my hand until I embrace his waist. He does it well, so much so that I see Andy uncertain, but he still doubts.

"One of Andy's friends, Ethan," I reply, deliberately stating that I will not make it on my list of friends. The guy's smile fades a little and he sits back with Andy after shaking his hands and introducing himself.

"I had no idea what you like, so I asked you, as I did," my friend winks at Josh, pushing the expensive, huge cocktail closer to him. "You got the usual, Tommo."

"Beer?" Josh looks at me, sipping on the sweet drink. Only Andy loves them. "Are we coming to such a fancy place and drinking beer?"

"Your date partner is a total party killer, I'll tell you in advance," my colleague laughs, and I kick him under the table. "I'm waiting for the moment to announce you're tired, so you're going home."

"He won't be today," Josh replies for me, and to my surprise, he drops his face into my neck and kisses me. Not very sensual and real, but maybe I just don't feel it because I'm surprised by it. "We have to dance."

"Shit!" Andy claps his hands. They're even crushed. "I need to see that. Damn, as if I had seen him dance for the last million years."

"Then we'll break this curse today," Josh grins, kissing my cheek after another sip, and then I feel his lips moving on my ear. "Relax! You're ruining our game."

"Okay, then let's drink something stronger," I respond with a smile and a louder voice to each of our team members, and then Andy climbs out of the box to go for a drink. "There's not enough beer for the dance."

"How long have you been hang out?" Ethan asks a little maybe... jealously?

"A few weeks ago," my much-better-off good friend replies instead of me. "We met at my appointment."

"Oh, are you a doctor?" The guy is amazed and sees Josh through.

"Something like that," the man standing next to me smiles and embraces me.

"Jesus, Louis, I hope you have nothing wrong," Ethan looks at me with a worried look, and Josh laughs.

"Unless he spits too many hairballs, I don't think I'd be dealing with it" He turns to me, and though I see the gist of his joke in his eyes, I think we should have clarified that anyone who knows that I don't belong in the cat category. I completely forgot about the roles. Josh obviously ordered himself over me, and that will be a look to Ethan as well. If we stay like this, we will not join together and be caught.

"Lions don't spit like that," I raise an eyebrow and try to look at Josh.

"No, they are not," he replies a little more seriously, lowering himself. So the mood is much warmer between us, which I hope I am not too spectacular, but completely embarrassed. This is an unusual form of conversation between the two of us, so it completely annoys me that I have to leave my comfort zone. I find it a blessing that Andy arrives with a whole tray of coarse alcohol and puts it just in the middle of the table.

I think it could be half an hour before Andy was soaked in the idea that we were going to dance. Ethan doesn't seem to be feeling well in our company, and I attribute all this to the fact that about two long minutes ago, Josh, who was also completely drunk, take my mouth prisoner and tried to bend twice, but I wouldn't let him. In addition, he released the alpha male's self again from alcohol. He's taller, stronger, and older than me. I have no idea how to quietly jump back from this thing. I'm not sober anymore, though I'm still highly credible than any of them, but it follows that Josh is really good at kissing. He tries a little aggressively to control, but it just throws his total value.

"Uh, guys!" Andy leans closer to yell at us. "Let's go already!"

"Okay, I'm in," the doctor replies, licking his lips. He'd want to get up when Andy holds him back.

"First a little thing..." My friend winks at us and puts four pills on the table... something. I have no idea what it name is right now, but he pushes one into his mouth without thinking, and Ethan immediately follows. Josh hesitates, and I really don't want my acquaintances to get involved in something they don't want.

"Thanks, no," I waved my hand at Andy, putting my dose in his mouth. He knows he could pray until tomorrow morning. If I say no to something, he couldn't changed it. I'm not saying I've never tried any of this shit, but I accepted it immediately. I don't ask for myself. "He doesn't use that."

"I think let him decide that," he grins at Josh and says he doesn't look at me. My best friend is about to fly my dating partner without my consent. Is this normal?

"We live once, don't we?" He shrugs his shoulder and looks at me with a restless look, but when he sees that I do not cause fire in my anger, he smiles and swallows the tablet. "And it's a special night."

He leans over and kisses me on my face, which makes me smile. I know what that sounded to others, obviously as if it meant me and our date. Meanwhile, I'm the only one who knows this is the first time he's ever got close to a guy who, though, in the present, I'm just playing, doesn't change the fact that he's over his first gay kiss.

We all get up and walk into the dancing crowd, where the emotions are released very quickly. Andy's not high that fast, but Josh's gone in the first quarter of the hour, and he's slicking to me so I barely breathe. Everything was sweaty and he didn't care for a minute. Clinging to my waist, he pulls me so close that with all my strength, I don't concentrate on anything from waist down, but he bites my neck, which makes me groan. Most of all, the power of surprise affects me, but I would lie if I said it was not a little irritating what he were doing. Especially with alcohol in our blood. Obviously, this is the reaction that brings the fuck out of me, because my hips are there to turn me over, in vain I try to work hard. I think it's slowly time to end the game, because it's starting to go wild, so I'm looking for Ethan from the corner of my eye. In the meantime, I've managed to get behind me, and since I can't see the guy anywhere around me, I feel the end point of the game when he makes it clear that he has an erection, and that is what I want to be aware of. God, I hope he won’t remember this tomorrow. I turn back to him, and he would lean over my mouth as I yell into his ear. "Ethan's left, and I'll go out to the bathroom." He just nods, but he doesn't come after me, dancing as he has, only without me.

It's fucking good to finally pee, and it feels so good like there's no one attached to me. I hope Josh really enjoys tonight and won't hate me tomorrow for all this if he sober up. I also shower my face with some cold water, and after the cool washbasin I reluctantly return to the crowd. I almost get shocked when I see Andy taking up my temporary spot and rubbing his butt at Josh's dick far more than I did. Especially since I didn't do it at all… Shit, Andy! I know he knows me well and he may have seen me through, but... For his sake, I hope he knew what was going on, or rather what wasn't going between me and Josh. Otherwise, he's the world's worst friend.

As soon as I remember Ethan, I start hurrying towards them, because I don't want to be panting in my neck again. Perhaps this has finally made it possible.

"Okay, love birds," I yell into their ears, and since they're stuck together, they can both hear it. "Come. I'll take you home, it's too late."

"This is my Louis!" He exclaims and my best friend laughs. "You've been a damn scary imitation for hours, buddy! There wasn't nothing!"

"Shut up!" I growled at him, but I smile a little so as not to take it too seriously. "Get out!"

I grab his hand and he grabs Josh's and shoves them toward the exit. The doc is still very high, but he seems to know where he is. Until then, no big deal. I hope... I'm having a hard time catching Josh in the back seat and Andy pops in after him. In fact, I have no idea where my veterinarian friend lives exactly, so I can't take him straight home, and even if I ask him, he doesn't answer, he just hums as if he's thinking, and then he starts his swinging saliva again with Andy. I'm stopping at Andy's apartment for the first time, and while naively I thought we would only put my ginger-haired friend here, Josh jump out and follow us to the gate. I have to smile because he wraps his arms around Andy's waist so sweetly from behind while he's struggling with the gate opening. This is perhaps the tallest dwelling in the city, and Andy bought an apartment at the top. Thus, its outlook is something divine, and even during summer time it has a wonderful roof terrace. Thirty-two floors have to be done with a relatively comfortable slow moving elevator, so I tilt the steel wall with my eyes closed to wait for it to arrive.

"Look!" Andy pushes aside and holds his phone closer. "Victor sent me to tell him my opinion."

"Daddy can't decide without you?" I snort when I see an amateur video upload to a porn site. "Who is this?"

"I don't know," he shrugs his shoulders and scrolls down a bit to see the video description. "Sweet creature… Very modest."

"Really… Is this the title or is it him?" I laugh and Josh pulls in to see the point. The recording features an obviously teenage boy. I'd be amazed if he was of legal age, but if the company wants to do business with him, he's probably eighteen. Looks like a typical saliva puppy. Curly hair, slim body, not too much muscle... There will definitely be a passive twink in the company image. The lighting is not so good, the room is dark enough, and Andy grabs the phone because he can't hold his hand, but the guy is alone in the video and indulges himself.

"What are we looking at?" Josh asks, but his voice is tired. "Oh! Work?"

"Kind of," Andy replies, looking at me with a look that I know was amazed that Josh knew about our work. I just smile and make a silent promise to tell the story. "The boss sent me to comment. The guy was recently found on the site. It's for the live section."

"As I look, it'll be right there," I roll my eyes. As you work staring at the camera yourself... Just for perverts who like to control company models from a distance. I think this boy would even enjoy it. Young, full of fire.

"I think he can bring a lot to the kitchen as a model," he nods in agreement, but does not immediately answer the big boss, just slides his phone back into his pocket with uncoordinated gestures and starts focusing on Josh. By the time we arrive, they are lost again, and I open the door lock.

"Get in!" I move them with great difficulty, but they move at the same time as if I really only needed to keep an established friend safe. "Josh, maybe…"

"Don't start, Tomlinson!" Andy tells me, grabbing the top of my even taller friend, they head to his bedroom. "You've been able to play with him so far, now I'm coming."

"Okay, but Andy…" I lean close to his ear because Josh doesn't know how to look at him, but I don't want him to hear it. "He's never been with a guy. He knows he's interested, but he has only tried one side."

"Take care of him," he replies seriously, and I know that no matter how much he is now, I can trust him. "You can sleep on the couch, Tommo."

I look back and think maybe Josh would really be better off here in the morning. I don't know if he'll accept that... Everything that happened tonight, and with Andy's smile as he closes the bedroom door, I know it's going to happen. I'd better stay here. Everyone is better off, at least I can supervise them if they can think of some bullshit beyond sex.


	5. Chapter 5

**Harry **

I'm just languishing in math when I get a message, and even though I think it came from Carol, it turns out to be just an email. Carol was so angry at me that she was sitting on another table today, though she was always beside me at other times. Even if we had disputes in the past, she was never so rude as not to sit next to me. Although I tried to talk to her, she never listened. She's not talking to me. I have no idea what I should do to reconcile. With a little sigh, I prefer to open the message under the table, which does not seem like an advertisement, because they call me at the beginning on my full name. But the sender is completely unknown to me. I run through the letter fastly... Then again. And again, because either I missed something or it was a very bad joke. Or I do not know…

"Teacher!" I put my hands up as I put my phone in my sweater's pocket. "Can I go to the bathroom?"

"Hurry!" Mrs. Austin replies kindly, and even at the very end of the word, I jump up to run out of the room. I lock myself in one of the toilet cubicles and read again. They respectfully talk to me in the letter, but I don't understand. This is a video that attracted a lot of interest. I have no idea what kind of video they are talking about because I have never put any video into life, even on Facebook. There is also a link in brackets that I need to click because I'm seriously confused. As the page loads, my eyes widen and I immediately close the screen to silence. It doesn't exist! Totally, fucking impossible for this to happen to me! I fetch my earphone out of my pocket, and after plugging it in, slowly open it with trembling fingers. I do not have any excuses. I remember everything now, but I can't believe Kevin did this to me. Have he really been able to put that damn video of me on the world's most popular porn site? As I became aware of what had happened, tears came to my eyes. If anyone sees it in school, they will make my life miserable. If it gets to the teachers, they'll be sure to tell my parents, and then... Then I'll have to hang up myself up. I don't survive that. I could never look into their eyes again. My God! I have no idea what to do with...

"Harry?" It smash into Carol's voice. What the hell's she doing in the boy toilet? I put away my phone with trembling hands and wipe my face with the end of my sweater as I step out the cab door. My best friend looks at me with gloomy looking eyes and I can't speak, just hiccups from crying.

"What the hell?" She asks in a tone she never speaks to me, then throws my bag at my feet. So, I think the class is over? Jesus, how long have I been here?! "Are you still sober? You look terrible!"

"No... I…" I can't say anything at once. I just went crazy. I got a shock or I don't know. She says no more, she just heads towards the exit and I feel the panic reign over me. "Carol! Please…"

Really pleading with her, and seeing her steps slow down, she stops sighing after a second "Please".

"Come to our place, Rosie's already there," her voice is cold, and I know she is still angry with this, only to feel sorry for me so painfully.

"No, Carol," I get after her hand, and now her eyes not so blank. I think she's looking at me with concern. "I can only talk to you about this. Please, Cary, don't be angry with me. I need you. I need you more now than ever in my life."

"Harry, you scare me," she steps up to me and looks at me, then grabs my hand and my bag to take me out of the bathroom. She crouches into the library and sits down in the backmost corner. Here, you can talk a little louder than just whispering, and not many people walk around us. I know that's why she brought me to this department. "Tell me what's wrong with you?"

"First of all, I’m sorry, Carol," I whimper and take her hands. She doesn't pull it away and I take this as a very good sign. "I was a jerk with you, but you're my best friend."

"Oh, Harry," she hugs me, and my tears start rolling down my face again. I don't want to cry so much anymore, but I just can't hold back. Pull down her sweater's sleeve and wipe it under my eyes as it pulls away the tears from me. "Tell me what's wrong. You're seriously scared."

"Kevin…" I start, and she frowns immediately.

"What did he do?" She asks, her voice strained and alert at the same time. "What did he do to you? Did he hurt you? I knew so much I shouldn't have left you…"

"No!" I'm trying to reassure her, but I'm even incapable. "He doesn't touch me... It's something else. I'd rather show you. I think…"

I take out my phone and leave the earphone in it, but without even giving it to Carol, I start the terrible recording again. She doesn't have to hear it, enough to see it. She opens her mouth as she watches it, and I stop the video in about half a minute.

"Did he put that on the internet?" She filters it in her teeth and pops it, but I can catch it in time.

"That's not the only thing," I shake my head and put the phone under my nose again, opening the message I received at the lesson.

"Who the hell is Victor Austin?" She grimaces, but I can see that the story is slowly coming to her. "Shit! This…"

"Yes," I nod, and I feel completely destroyed.

"This website?" She asks as I lean closer to the mobile. "Live Imagine?"

I look at the small screen with huge eyes because I don't want to believe I haven't noticed it before. Only the guy's name came to my attention, and the company name, in colorful, curved letters, did not appear. This is serious? Anyone make a sport of me? This is the page I subscribed to because of Tommo. It does not exist!

"Don't answer that, Harry," shake her head suddenly and give back my phone. "This is completely stupid."

She looks into my eyes and I think she can see my hesitation or I don't know, but she looks at me as if we have jumped forward in time and have already said yes to them. I know this is a tough thing, they are practically calling me to make porn, but now that I have the idea that Tommo's there... I might have a chance to meet him. Maybe I should know him.

"Jesus, Harry, I hope you don't think about it, this is crazy!" She whispers with a muffled voice, leaning closer to my face. "You're sixteen! Just imagine what your parents would say if they found out. You'll get confinement for a lifetime."

"Of course I know," I nod quickly and try to convince myself that this will be the best. She’s right. I'm not answering the letter, it's really stupid. "Do not worry about it."

"But I can do it for another reason," she growls, then turns around and run away. I grab my bag to run after, but I only get to one of the corridors where Kevin is dragged out of his company to talk to each other.

"…he was drunk and high! You fucked him up, you dick!" I hear the end of Carol's sentence before I get there. Kevin looks surprisingly scared, though the fact that Carol is not a small flower when she's angry.

"He was in it, too," he says softly, and my best friend is about to explode.

"Also to put it on the internet?!" She filters it in his teeth and Kevin takes a step back from us but does not escape. "How can you be such a jerk?"

"It's not my fault, I..." he begins to disintegrate, but then takes a deep breath to continue more calmly. "I had no bad intentions with him. I was drunk, too. I made the video for myself. But my friends found it on my phone and…"

"And what?" Carol barked at him, and the guy looks as if he was repetitioning for Mr. Remond. The prick is a very rough figure. Everybody is scared of him, and even the glass eye puts a cold look on it. The guy is creepy, and now Carol is no less.

"I said I did it to put it on the internet," he says quieter, and I see he regrets it, though it doesn't help much. The video is already up, and when I last opened it had thousands of views. Oh my god, this makes my throat dry out again and I could cry too. "I thought I'd get away with it, but they were enthusiastic and thought it was a party to register it right away. I'm sorry! Seriously!"

"Delete it immediately!" The red-haired, and now my fiery best friend, catches him, and he immediately picks up his phone. "Let me see."

He answers nothing, just logs in and deletes the entire profile as it is.

"That's right," Carol muttered, but she still didn't let go. "And now the video from your phone."

He hesitates a little here, then looks at me, as if trying to say something without words, but I don't understand. In the end, he just whispers an order and deletes it. A huge stone is falling from my heart and I don't feel every moment that I want to cry. Carol grabs my hand and pulls me away from Kevin without a word.

They ring for physics, so we go straight into the room and my best friend finally sits down next to me. It feels so good. More comforting than any words. As the teacher arrives, everyone stops and start listening to the lesson. Carol just scribbles something in her exercise book and I lean my head and stare at the book, but I don't read a word, just think about the email. It came from Live Imagine. I'm not mistaken, I know he works there too. I just don't know what to do. I've been searching for days for him. Only one trace if I could find it, but nothing. He practically does not exist on the Internet, only on that website, and only under the name Tommo. Already, the idea of what if the movies are over. Of course, I will look at them all over and over again, but I know that is not enough. Already there are few. I want pictures of him. Even in clothes. With friends, with family. I want to know what his hobby is. There must be some fucking sexy thing. Let's say DIY or I don't know. He assembles cars. Something masculine. I feel it. His recordings exude masculinity. I wish I could get to know him and then he would love me. He could rule over me, do anything. If only I had one chance to talk to him.

I shake my mind that Carol is putting a torn booklet in front of me and scribbling a message.

_ "I hope you're not thinking about that stupid thing, Hazza?" _

Of course she reads in my mind. She always does that. Carol knows me too well. Should I lie to her? I could lie, he would never find out, but I don't want to. I don't want to lose her and I know that if I lie, it can happen. It was terrible to know that I was not with her and I would never want to relive it.

_ "I don't know..." _ I write quickly on the paper and then push it back. She covers her mouth, looks at me dramatically, and her eyes are full of questions before leaning over the page to answer. She writes something long enough, so I'm getting ready for the downing.

_ “This is a huuuuge stupidity, Harry! BULLSHIT! I'm not as smart as you are, but I know it can be very dangerous. This is not a game! Seriously not! Don't do such an idiot thing. You can be in big trouble, in front of your parents or even your teachers. Not worth it. Why are you even thinking about that? ” _

Her words are so upset. I can tell exactly what she is feeling and I can almost hear her nervous voice telling me these. True. All of her words. But then why can't I say no and it's done? To be better, I know exactly why not. Tommo is the reason. Of course I know what a foolish thing it is that if I say yes to anything and probably after they know my age they won't count with me anymore, but Tommo... He's still smiling in front of my spiritual eyes and that doesn't leave me alone.

_ "I don’t know…" _

She chuckles beside me and get my head to the teacher. He shouldn't take the note or the form master will complain about my behavior.

_ "It makes sense to talk to you today" _ she writes a reply to the sheet, just smiles at me and then kindly caresses my thigh. I know she sees how anxious I am, but I don’t want to tell her now why I even think about going into the offer. I can't, I'm not even legal. But could I still go there? Maybe I could see him…

_ “I just don't know. That's it. It must pay well. We could spend the money on cool things. We could go to so many places you know…” _

I know how stupid this sounds, but there is truth in it. I get pocket money from mom, but I'm sure not as much as a company like this would pay.

_ “I don't care how much they pay. You don't need anything cool to give yourself in return, Hazza. Just don't think about it anymore. Let it go. We'll go through this shit and they'll get you into some great college with your brain. If you graduate you can earn a lot of money. You can still spend it on me!” _

I smile as I read and just scratch at what I already knew. That's right. I shouldn't have to sell myself to have more pocket money. But wouldn't it be worth it for Tommo? For his beautiful blue eyes? For his shaggy hair? He has perfect hair. I don't like boys who just cut it short because it's just okay. Or the complete balds… That also makes me cringe. I need my fingers to get tangled in my lover's hair. Tommo's like that. Then that upper body, and his legs are so muscular. There is also a tattoo over the flawless buttocks. Sexy. Fucking sexy. You can't believe how much. And then I didn't even talk about his voice, especially when he was controlling who he was with. He gives him orders, tells him what to do. If I just imagine doing this to me... I'm already rock hard. Fuck! I shouldn't do that in the school. I'd just have to think about it at home, because now I'm going to cover my pants with my books throughout the break.

***

As I enter my room, I'm still not better. Not a single drop. I couldn't get Tommo out of my head the whole damn day, and it made it very uncomfortable to be around people. I know I should map out the rest of the movies because otherwise they will run out too soon, but now I think I need it all the more to help me...

I close my door and make a few hanky for my hand and lean on my bed to pick something from the side. I get up from the momentum and gaze at the screen with dripping saliva as I open the actors and see a new photo of him in his profile. He's shirtless and leans on a table. His hair is messy and he has a little stubble that makes me completely wild. I just can't get enough of it. His trousers are unbuttoned and the glittering peak of his erection peels out of the jeans. One hand is relaxed on the thigh and the other is on the back of the head. It's so incredibly sexy. I think I stare at it for ten minutes before scrolling down to see him move. Selecting the perfect movie, I see in the first few seconds that a wonderful forty minutes await me. As always…

Before Mom calls me for dinner, I decide to reply to this email. I thought carefully about it, but as much as I want this man, I'm not yet of legal age. In the meantime, I'm not sure they'll talk to me. In my message I write that I'm sorry, but I can't take it because I'm only sixteen and I live with my parents, but I would be interested in the offer, maybe after I turn eighteen. That's what I decide for myself, of course, anything can happen, and by that time I can think of it much more mature. Now even the video uploaded by Kevin was able to move me to tears, I would be afraid at every moment of seeing who and when all my friends and relatives would know. I can't risk it. I'm too young for it. With this calm, and I think I will go down with a conscious, grown-up decision to eat with my family, tell them my day - of course, leaving out the horrors - and then get everyone back to own relax. I also took a shower and packed my stuff for tomorrow when I take my phone back, there was a fresh email waiting for me.

  
  


_ Dear Mr. Styles, _

_ We have received your letter but do not yet wish to consider it as your final reply. I have forwarded the problems to the CEO. He would like to schedule an appointment with you on Friday afternoon. Unfortunately he won't be to the city before, but he is looking forward to talking about the issues and their resolution in person. Please come to the footer address by 4pm on Friday afternoon, Mr. Austin is already looking forward to the appointment. _

_ Please let us know if you still can't visit us. It would be important to know. _

_ Thank you for your understanding and your response! _

_ Sincerely, The Live Imagine Team  _

  
  


With a big sigh, I tilt my head against my pillow. They really want me and it feels good. I've never had a situation like this in my life. If I think about it all... It wouldn't be a terrible stupid thing anyway. I was worried about my age, but I told them honestly and they still want to talk to me. What's more, the big boss wants it! As flattering as it is, it is just as scary. I'd love to delete all the messages from them and never think of them again, but there's the other half. What if I could see Tommo on Friday when I go in, or even if he far? What if I could talk to him? I know he's a porn star not a Hollywood celebrity, but they also ask for a photo in their circles? I'd die for a picture with him. As a treasure, no question. For minutes, I can think of nothing more than that imaginary encounter, and that perhaps that would be enough to somehow grab him. That I might just find out his full name and then get in touch with him. This meeting could bring him together. I'm leaving on Friday. There I can say another clear gender, while my chances of seeing him multiply. I type in the polite answer that I want to be there and then hang up my phone. It's too late. They probably won't respond today, at all. It is also superfluous, since we discussed everything.

  
  


***

  
  


I enter the building that looks like a huge office building, where very handsome men walk out or come in with me. I'm definitely in the right place, but as long as everyone else can go further with a magnetic card, I'm stuck in the foreground looking at where I should go.

"Can I help you?" A tall and rather frightening security guard comes up to me, whose voice is shaken.

"I'm Harry Styles," I start softly, raising an eyebrow at my total lack of confidence. "I have an appointment today for Mr… Victor Austin."

"Go to the reception desk," he points to the black marble counter next to the gate, where two pretty women are phoning. "They'll be able to help you."

"Thank you!" I nod, but he just shakes his head and leaves. I quickly take my feet to the counter, where they immediately greet me with a dazzling smile.

"How can we help?" the younger lady asks, while she continues to serve the pages in front of her.

"My name is Harry Styles and…"

"Oh, Mr. Styles!" She gets a look at me, and quickly bypassing the black marble, she comes up to me and then pin a guest card on my sweater. "We've been waiting for you. I'll accompany you to the Director."

"Thank you," I reply softly, as it makes me completely embarrassed that I was treated properly in such a movie. Strange, but it feels good. The lady doesn't talk to me anymore, and as we walk through the building, I frantically run my head in every direction I see movement, to see if it's Tommo. This afternoon is my only chance. We go up to the tenth floor with a glazed elevator, where everything really shines and is luxurious. I've never been in such an fancy place in my life. She asks me to sit in the armchair next to the door because Mr. Austin still has his previous meeting.

Maybe I'll wait five minutes for the door to open and devour a big one. After a few moments, a guy with red hair and freckles appear. I know who this is! Jesus! This is the guy that Tommo has so many videos with. It can't… In reality, his features are even nicer than in the shots. Could it exist? What if Tommo is much hotter live than on-screen, and not only have my spontaneous erections, but also orgasms when I see him? I smile at myself and jump up as the other man looks at me. He is taller than me and his hair has started to turn gray, but still has a real dark brown tint. A black-framed, spectacularly expensive first-hand branded glasses sits on his nose and wears a gray suit. He looks very attractive. A little scary for me, maybe. Not even Robin is such a serious man. I may not have seen one like this yet, and here I am, here alone, in a meeting, and I'm afraid I will swallow my tongue and I won't be able to speak.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Styles," he offers me his hand, which I return immediately as I analyze his voice. Dear, like everyone who had any conversation with us, either in my email or down there. "Come in. One more colleague will join us and we will discuss the details of your contract."

"I see," I nod awkwardly and nod to the huge office, then sit down where he shows me. It offers everything from coffee to cognac to everything, really, but I just shake my head and look at what's going to happen with a sweaty palm. After a small knock, the door opens, and a man like Mr. Austin walks through it, then heads towards me and hands his hand.

"Gerald Austin," shake my hand and give me a big smile as I feel the whole situation become so uncomfortable. Or just me, I don't know.

"Harry Styles," I nod, then sit down opposite me on the other side of the coffee table, and Victor joins him.

"Well, as we described in the email, we saw your video uploaded to the Internet and found it really engaging. We thought you might do it in a little more serious circumstances, with professional equipment, and of course generously paid." Victor begins by putting a few sheets of paper on the table. "I'd be interested in what you think. The story of the video, the launch, and then we'll show you our website, giving you a little more insight into our company, including the department you thought of."

"Um..." I start miserably, and Gerald raises his eyebrows, making my heart cruel. And not in the good way. I feel if I don't put myself together, they'll get out of here in no time, and I won't have a chance to hear the details. "That video was a coincidence, actually. Made at a party where in my life... for the second time, actually, but I drank a lot. It was done by a guy who put it on the internet, but I didn't know about it. It's not up there anymore."

"Did it bother you seeing it on the Internet?" Gerald asks, his voice freezing objectively.

"Sure," I say carefully. I don't know what a good answer to that would be for a trial like this, but I don't think this would be. "I also wrote how old I am. I don't want my mom or my classmates to see me."

"Yes, and that is understandable," Victor takes over, which I am a little happy about because I already like him a lot. He speaks kindly to me, not like the other man, and listens attentively. Demure. But with his brother. At least I think it is, by their name and their similarity. "Our company is diverse. It has a page with traditional films produced under serious shooting conditions, or one that may be still in its infancy, but is constantly evolving. This is about live video. I'd rather talk about that because we imagined you there."

I just nod and listen attentively to all the sentences. He gives me a very long introduction and even a laptop in front of me presents what it looks like. For about an hour, I just listened to it, and since then I haven't said a word because Victor keeps talking. It's reassuring because I don't have to, and in fact what he's saying is not that terrible at all. They don't want me to make specific porn movies, but just to play with myself live, via webcam, for others. And bloody hell, holy shit, fucking for a lot of money. I still know how bad this is, and I shouldn't even think about it. I'm trying to think of Carol's words, because she was right about why I'd be worldwide bullshit to do anything like that. This is not what she was against, but quite different, and perhaps it would not be so much an excuse, but it does not change the fact that, if it turned out, I could be shot in the head because I would not survive.

"What do you think?" he stops with a question, and suddenly I don't know what it is because I was very upset.

"I just…" I start in a hoarse voice and continue after clearing my throat. "Actually, I was just thinking about being a minor and what kind of problems this could cause. And what about seeing someone in my environment."

"Well, that's not an easy question," Victor takes a deep breath and picks up the papers on the table. "Your age is quite problematic. You can only sign the contract as an adult... of course. But we have a loophole that we are willing to say if you want to work with us."

"Can you tell me?" I look curiously at his smile and nod.

"We can make an ID card with your details, but by the date of birth you will be eighteen. This is risky, just in case we get control."

"A fake ID?" I ask in a worried voice, I know for sure that I was even jumping an octave.

"You wouldn't be our first employee," Gerald says now, with a slightly friendlier voice. "The company has never failed like this."

"What about my face?" I ask softly. They were even more frightened of me with the fake documents, and then even that is there. It's impossible for me to get into this.

"You could wear a mask in the beginning," Victor raises, as if he had just figured it out in those moments. "It would be exciting to see no one but his eyes, his mouth and his body. It would give a mystery to your personality."

"And mystery attracts people," Gerald takes the floor. "And the money in your account. What you say?"

Before they could say anything, someone knocks on the door and a former woman opens it. I don't hear what she says for a second because I see him through the open door. It was only a second from the side as he lifted a paper cup of coffee to his mouth, but when the red-haired guy walking beside him crawled into the picture, I'm sure I could see it. I want to run out there. Right now. But I don't know what they would think of me at the time, so I wouldn't budge, just stare at the little doorway to see if they changed their minds and turned to see Tommo again. Only for a single breath.

"All right," Victor says, as she prepares to leave the office. "Tell them in ten minutes I'll be there."

The lady nods and closes the door, blocking me from seeing Tommo again. I can't believe this is happening to me. Why couldn't you walk past the damn door when I was sitting outside?

"Well, Mr. Styles," Victor turns to me. "I'm sorry, but they are waiting for another meeting soon. What do you think? Under those conditions would it be included?"

"Yes," I say to him, not thinking for a minute. I am blinded by the fact that if I can visit this building every day, he will be here. I can't think of anything else, just a fraction of a second in front of my eyes over and over and over again... Completely blinding to everything else and taking away all common sense.

"Great news!" Claps his palms and gives me a hand and then gets up from his armchair and grabs some folders from his desk. "My brother will help with the contracts. Don't hurry, read everything carefully before you sign, okay?"

"Of course," I nod, and I'm still ecstatic of what I just saw. So far, Tommo was nothing more than a man through the screen of my phone, and I was completely mad. And now? It all came to life in front of me. Full actually walked past the door and I saw his smile on his face. It caused an explosion in my heart that I could not see him again after that. I stay with Gerald in the room and sign each sheet of paper he puts in front of me.


	6. Chapter 6

**Louis**

I realize that the front door and the bathroom door close almost simultaneously, causing a severe headache, though I suspect that is not the only reason for this super morning feeling. Obviously, I was overdoing drinking yesterday, though not nearly as much as Josh and Andy. But I haven't heard them crawl into the bathroom too often, so maybe it's not that much of a problem. I turn around a little more, trying to exclude the strong sunlight sparkling on top of the skyscraper, but I'm not very successful, so I just sigh and turn around and give up the fight. By the time I manage to open my eyes, Josh is standing next to the sofa and looks down at me with a sleepy, very skinned smile.

"Just five more minutes," I ask him in a groaned voice, before he laughs softly.

"I'm not your mother, you can roll around all morning," he starts laughing at the kitchen, and I just grumble and turn to his back. After a few minutes, a very tempting coffee scent creeps into the living room, but there is no excuses, I have to get up. I shove into Andy's luxurious kitchen, and Josh brings me a nice smile to my cup of coffee he has already filled. I mix some spoonfuls of sugar in it, hoping for the energy I need and sit down against him.

"All right?" I ask him, he's raising his eyes on me, honoring the steaming black so far. I hope he doesn't hate me so much. I heard something that night, and even though I dragged him to the bar, I certainly didn't bump him into Andy's bed. "Are you very hangover? Should I give you something? I'm sure Andy has a whole pharmacy here."

"No doubt," he nods with a grin, but there is something in his smile that I think I need to bring to the surface. "But I don't think I need more medicine. Andy gave me before he left. I think we can just..."

"Talk if you feel the need to," I continue with the line of thought where I think he's stuck with a nod. I must smile at the uncertainty of the serious, grown man. I take a sip of the mug and look at it. "Do you remember everything?"

"There's a party what's a little foggy, but to my misfortune, it's less about everything," he replies with a sigh, then shrugs his eyebrows. "I'm sorry razzed on you at the end. I swear I just had a good time with you. With them."

"No problem," I wave and take it as cool as I can to make things easier. "Thanks more because I asked for it. And I'm glad you enjoyed the evening."

"You didn't ask me to put my tongue down your throat or anything," he explains. Okay, maybe I still need to practice diversion.

"Leave it," I grin resolutely, reaching for a full, cookie box in the middle of the table to start to eat. "What do you feel now? After Andy?"

"A little confused," he scratches his temple, but he seems to really want to talk about it, and I'm very glad. It will do good, I'm sure. "Andy's a very nice guy, he was so attentive to everything and he cared."

"Are you talking about that red freckled guy?" I look at him with big eyes and he just laughs at my joke. "You know, with that weird Scottish accent."

"Yes, of course I do," kick my ankle under the table, and we both laugh until we continue. "He really was attentive."

"Weird..." I grin and throw a piece of cookie into my mouth. "Joke aside, I'm glad and I expected it."

"Still, I feel weird," he shakes his head, then reaches for my hand to take some cookie. It's a strange direct action from him because even though one of the people in my environment I think I would entrust my life to, we haven't had such a direct relationship so far. Of course, this is really nothing compared to our hearty evening saliva exchange. "Like when you're so drunk and you watch yourself out of your body. Do you understand?"

"Not really, but it's okay," I shake my head. "Um... Did you enjoy it? I mean..."

"Sure!" cut at me, pulling out of my embarrassment. I shouldn't be so confused about this topic, but these two people are my two best friends. It's strange to talk about their evening adventure. Which, of course, I listened, because high sex doesn't belong in the quiet and controlled category. It was a really great experience, which I think has irreparably damaged my soul. "It was wonderful. I just... I don't know what to do now. Should I call him for a date? Let's pretend it didn't happen anything and start dating right from the beginning? We skipped a few steps last night."

"Do you want to date with Andy?" My chin was fall and I think this is not just a word. Specifically, I look at him with a confused face.

"What's wrong with that?" He looks at me with curious eyes, and I know he is seriously waiting for an answer to my problem.

"No problem, but..." I begin, and my sentence drowns in a worried sigh. "He has the same job as me. You know this, right?"

"I know," he says confidently. It strikes me that this whole thing would be really okay for him, even willing to start a relationship with him, despite everything. There have been people in my environment who have said this to me, but of course I couldn't believe it. I find it impossible for a normal, ordinary person to get over it and accept that his/her partner, who should be the only one in his/her life, sleeps with others daily. Even if there are no emotions, even... It's morbid and I can't imagine.

"Andy's not really dating," I pull my mouth away, and he cuts a thoughtful face. "I think no one in our circles."

"I understand this actually, but..." he says, but his voice remains nice. "What if I don't care? I mean maybe, I don't care what kind of circles you are talking about.'

"Maybe? I look at him with an eyebrow raised. "You should know that."

"Louis, I have a little confusion in my head," he leans back in his chair and shakes his head. "All this is very new to me, and all I know is that we talked for hours afterwards, and I like this guy. Maybe ... We could get to know each other better, right? This is not yet a wedding ring, and not because he is male or playing in adult films. Just because it works like this for all normal people and I don't want to treat him differently. Or to make him feel different."

"Okay, you convinced me" I laugh because he gave me a much more honest and thoughtful answer than I expected. He was serious about this, no question. I still don't understand, but I accept. "Andy told you about him?"

"I love how diplomatic you can be," he grins and starts nodding. "If you think that he has an affair with your boss and you two have made countless movies together, then yes. He told me quite enough about his life. And about you..."

"Andy's my best friend," I begin, but immediately goes down.

"I know he is," he nods, smiling, and it feels like we're in a fucking way talking like father-son. "I'm not going to hurt your friend, Louis. I promise."

"I wasn't scared of him either." I laugh and he joins.

"How serious is this with him and the boss?" He asks, taking his voice a little more seriously. "Do I disrupt it?"

"Oh, if you think so seriously, definitely!" I raise my eyebrows and nod firmly. Somehow I'd be calmer if Andy would spend all the time with Josh he's wasting on Victor now. "The boss has a family. To have fun with young boys in hotel rooms or in his office is just his secret hobby. But he's the type of person who will never change. That's enough for him. False harmony in public, dirty secrets behind the scenes. Andy thought he would lure him into the light, but it had been a while. Although I think he still enjoys spending time with him."

"He has a porn factory, he probably understands his business," he continues, and this topic doesn't really seem to bother him. How the hell it doesn't bother him? "Andy's explicitly demanding attention. I hope it's not the man, but the fun that attracts him so much. I can compete with that.

"I'm gonna find out this," I wink, and he gave me just a smirk. "So what happened between you... Are you okay with it?"

"I think I owe you gratitude," he nods contentedly, and takes the last piece of cookie by the time I spread my hands in anger, of course not seriously, and he just shrugs his shoulders with a grin, as if to say, _'That's it, asshole.'_ they would both get along well with Andy in the long way. "If you didn't call me yesterday to save you, I probably wouldn't have tried it myself."

"I don't need any details at all," I hold my hand, grinning in front of me. "It was enough to be an ear at night, no visuals, thank you."

"I'm afraid you can imagine" he laughs before swallowing the cookie and the last sip of coffee. I'm a little reassured by how loosely he can handle all of this, and we're even joking about what my work is. I was pleasantly disappointed because I never thought Josh would accept this. I didn't even plan on ever telling him what I do. And now... He pretends like I am just a seller in his favorite comic book store.

"Obviously I can..." I Iaugh too, but he looks at me.

"But the blind man sees clearly you're not happy, Lou," he shakes his head anxiously. That still leaves me feeling like I was getting into a weird sit-down with Josh, where he took the role of a wise dad in my eyes. "I don't want to force you this much, but I can recommend a good school, and by the time you graduate, it's time. You don't have to change your whole life right away, but you have time to think and prepare. When the time comes, you might already have the opportunity to move in another direction."

"Maybe I'll surprise you now, but I'd appreciate it if you could write down that school's name," I reply, smiling a little shorter than average. "I haven't decided on anything yet, but I have a lot of free time, more than an average working adult, and going to school is never a bad thing. And as you say, I can still decide."

"Then," he leans back in his chair with the arrogant grin that makes me laugh at him. "Good to hear that, Tomlinson."

"I promised I think about it, remember?" I start packing our mugs and cleaning up. "I did."

"I'm really happy to hear that, Louis," he replies, caressing his hand as he gets up from the table.

"If I'm working for you, you can start arranging for Andy to be rescued," I joke with him, and then walk into the living room to get a little tidy up on the couch. It would be time for me to go home slowly.

"You can save only those who need to be rescued, and leave," he replies wisely as he picks on yesterday's sweater he threw on the back of his chair as he sat in the kitchen. "But, of course, I hope he will allow it over time."

"If you can make him to be his everything he will follow you blindly, then you can do anything with him." I laugh, because it really is. If Andy loves someone and is important to him, he would do anything for his happiness. That's one of the features of the versatile Andy that I like best. Still strange to think about, but damn, I think I would like them together.

After we're both done and made sure we won't leave a big mess in Andy's luxury apartment, I take Josh home. Although he kindly invite me for another cup of coffee or some lunch, I just promise him next time and then I drive home. I don't want anything but a warm shower and then a full-day quake.

By the time I climb out of the hot water, my ordered food has arrived. I eat it while I watch a pointless comedy series, then go to bed and throw everything down except myself. I climb under my blanket and, with my laptop on my lap, I turn on the bedroom TV to start the idle relaxation. Andy hates my side for being able to spend a full day in bed and do absolutely nothing, but throw me the first stone who tried and hated it.

After looking through some social media pages, gathering the latest life events from my friends, I open my email because I haven't done so in days, and when I read a letter from an apparently pseudonymous account, my blood freezes.

_Hi my beauty,_

_It's been a long time since I've been planning to write to you, but I decided it was time to watch that new video. With the little blonde, you know. You treated him as if he had done something wrong that deserved punishment. It was a fucking excitement. I unintentionally imagined what you could do to get me out of it. I'm sure if you got in my hands with that ass, you wouldn't get away with it as much as your little friend. I'll fuck you while you beg for it to finish. I would love to have your body tied to the bed, vulnerable to do whatever I want with you. I promise, baby, one day I'll show you what I mean. You're going to spend memorable evenings with me, after which your name won't even come to mind, little prince. I promise you. I'm already very ready for that meeting._

_I cannot wait to see you again. Those two dogs in the park pretty much booked you last time. I did not want to disturb. Next time. But you better know that I'm going to be very angry if you don't rub off your little doc friend. I don't like to share my toys with anyone, and I wouldn't take my heart off if anyone was injured. You do better if you listen to me, my dear._

_I'll talk to you soon!_

I read this shit a thousand times with my eyes wide open, and I manage to revive myself enough to reach for my phone left in the bedside table and quickly call Andy.

"I don't really have time right now, Tommo," he says immediately, trying to shake me off, but I won't let him. I know for sure where he is and what he is doing... or he is just going to do it, but now I am completely don't give a fuck.

"Andy, I don't care how busy you are with the boss's cock right now," I quit. More than likely he's with Victor. They often meet when we have a day off. "I fucking need you!"

"What happened, Louis?" his voice immediately becomes serious, and I am very grateful for it. I'm serious about getting a heart attack.

"I received a fucking scary email," I say, in a nutshell, as I hear a large amount of air blowing out. Maybe he was expecting something more serious, but for me, that was serious enough to make me happy the thought, I don't have to go out on the street today. The problem is that tomorrow it will be, but after that I would not do it. The guy in the letter described things he shouldn't know about. What no one knows except those close to me, which means watching and following me and making me tremble as the cold shakes. - I'm not kidding, he's fuckin' creepy! He described in detail how he wanted to rape me and..."

"Calm down, Louis," he interrupts, and there is no sign of previous understanding. "We can't count how many shit we've got. Just delete it and forget it."

"That's it, Andy!" I raise my voice a little because I want to take it seriously. "Other times I do. But this is not a joke! This guy knows me. He knows what I do in my daily life, what I do in my spare time. About my hobby... He knows about Josh! He threatened to stay away from him, or one of us might be in trouble. This is not funny!"

"Calm down, Louis," he repeats himself. "Send me this message, okay? I want to read it. And if you've got that scared, don't go anywhere today. Maybe he's really watching you. When did the message come?"

"Two days ago," I reply quickly after I check the date. "What if he saw us yesterday? Josh..."

"Okay, stay home today," she says again, and I know she's reassuring, but I can't say he's successful in this task. To put it mildly, I squeezed myself out of this letter, and I just hope that it doesn't actually carry any real threats. Just someone with a big mouth. Although knowing what I'm doing when I'm not shooting with the "little blonde" is scary. "I'll go over in the evening. Just watch a movie or sleep. But don't panic, okay?"

"I'll try," I nod very seriously, as if he could see, and after saying goodbye, I dive into my blanket, fold down the top of my laptop and try to delve into the details of the current movie, completely excluding it. I'm already lucky because my brain spins nonstop and spins around the letter I received.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, I'm very curious what you think. Tell me your opinions. I post the Hungarian part every Wednesday, so every Thursday night I'll post an English part to you. Aaaand tell me what do you think of Louis's new single? I love it, and I'm very proud of him! I've listened to it about 200 times...


End file.
